A lawyer friend of mine was invited on a ‘jolly’ as he described it, in Cambridge, a marquee on the riverbank, champagne on tap, canapés, strawberries and cream on a balmy afternoon. That was the perception or expectation in my friend’s head at any rate!
It transpired to be a few people crammed onto a punt - no champagne – a few beers and several punnets of warm strawberries which my rather dapper, affable friend was left holding, squeezed in between two giggly young girls. Nothing against the giggly young girls - just not perhaps the Henley-esque experience that he was expecting or maybe hoping for!
Perception, misperception is a common occurrence and where coaching is concerned it happens often. So, may I offer you some clarification?
I reflect on three meetings;
The first was a client, a very capable CEO. He joined the organisation less than 18 months ago and it was significantly loss making, he took this ailing company to becoming very saleable organisation and a deal concluded early this week (a multi-million pound deal, I will add). Did I see a confident, ballsy, excited individual, proud of his recent achievement? I did not! Admittedly, as many of you will testify taking a company through an exit is no mean feat - exhausting, exhilarating, frustrating, exciting, tedious and any other descriptive you care to mention (some of which are best left unwritten!) however the exit and perhaps the anticlimax hailed the start of a new era.
Do you ever have that feeling when you have heaps to do or even one specific thing to do and hard as you try you can’t seem to make the first step to tackling it, head-on or even from the sidelines in stealth mode? This is where we started.
The session enabled the client to articulate the real issues that were going on and therefore reveal the path ahead. Some-one else really probing, asking challenging questions and making one accountable for ones actions - that makes a huge difference to how one moves ahead and progresses. More importantly having an impartial and unbiased supporter that will be metaphorically speaking ‘on your side’ through the ups and downs, and also providing a softer cushion of support when it’s required.
An email later arrived from the client saying ’I've come back determined, energized and focused on my great achievement and on the positives, and to milk both for all they are worth!‘
That was coaching. My client shall remain nameless and I was the coach.
Meeting number two, is with a highly regarded entrepreneur, hugely successful businessman, published author, public speaker and generally great bloke.
The two meet at a disceet location in London, they discuss business, aspirations future strategy, global poverty…..
This man is charismatic, steely sharp and incredibly generous with his time and advice. He asks the most incisive of questions and really gets to the heart of an issue – evoking one to really explore all avenues and most importantly really hone in and focus on where one is headed.
From a position of great experience and knowledge, the entrepreneur imparts advice, encouragement and methodologies as to how the other might significantly grow their business in a supportive yet challenging way.
Specific, measurable suggestions that not only enable but also inspire! Topics covered are wide and varied; people, motivation, target market, USPs, finance, legal, marketing and the myriad of other issues facing companies and executives today.
I walked out onto the Strand positively bouncing with excitement and renewed vigour and drive (I still am in fact!).
That was mentoring and I was the privileged mentee and it was a gift.
Meeting number three;
An individual that I know well has been hugely successful in business (and continues to be) and has great friends and family.
Some 20 years ago, my friend grew up with alcoholic parents and lost his mother when he was eighteen in a tragic accident (doubtless caused by the alcohol abuse). At certain times in life this causes him to not only find a given situation very challenging but also he finds it extremely difficult in knowing how to handle it.
He sees a psychotherapist regularly and is slowly overcoming and being able put aside some of the pain.
This is counselling (or therapy), the friend shall remain nameless and the psychotherapist is a member of the British Association of Psychotherapists. Occasionally coaching will stray into areas of our psyche that require the services of a specialist counsellor or therapist – a good coach would always point out that they were not best placed to assist and refer on in such situations.
There is often some confusion defining coaching, mentoring and counselling. There is a time and place for each and the results and outcomes from each intervention can be extraordinary and potentially life-changing. However, they are each very different and it is essential that the boundaries of each aren’t blurred as this is when the wrong intervention can cause entirely the wrong outcome!
My lawyer friend was subsequently invited to the British Grand Prix by a generous corporate organisation; this reality super-ceded his expectation! Use coaching, mentoring or counselling at the right time in the right place and you will find that your expectations are more than likely surpassed too.
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach. Contact her at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Monday 16 July 2007
'Do you have a conflict management strategy? '
Conflict sadly seems to be around us most of the time in the world at large and in our day to day business.
The most successful teams and companies have spontaneous and varied outlets for new ideas, innovations and approaches, however, it is also however these creative ideas, innovations and approaches that can be the very ingredients to conflict!
Therefore it is probable that the two greatest skillsets that will directly affect the success and longevity of your business are not only strategic planning but also conflict management! Having been inadvertently on the sidelines of a major conflict between two parties at the week-end and in my work as an Executive Performance Coach – seeing the stress and behavioural barriers to success that ensue, I know this to be true.
You´ve probably heard the saying "the bone is strongest where the break heals" (that is actually medically true!), the same applies to relationships (business or otherwise!), and this may, actually, give organizations a competitive edge. Unresolved conflicts are harmful and put a business at risk. Companies are often comprised of emotional hot houses and systems that are likely to have conflicts at some point or another. Several studies on M&A deals suggest that the largest number fail because of lack of conflict regulation processes. I have observed that those who do well are those who have found ways to regulate and appreciate differences of opinion even and especially if they are potentially explosive. These companies enjoy a competitive advantage, as they are better able to work together, trust each other, and react faster to the changing economic environment. The resulting outcome also leads to better, wiser decisions.
So if you have a conflict management process, fabulous! If not a few pointers which may assist;
• Conflict is normal; differences of opinion are healthy
• Managed conflicts are beneficial
• Build self confidence in emerging leaders
• Strengthen bonds
• Create rich diversity, more options
• Must be dealt with quickly and fairly
• Process is as important as outcome
• Hard bargaining is a poor second to interest based negotiations
Best practices to prevent conflicts:
• Clear strong leadership that is meritocracy based.
• Good employment policies: compensation, employment, exit and entry, reviews.
• Formalized meetings.
• Strong, effective governance with a truly independent board.
• Formalized meetings for sharing and understanding the collective and individual beliefs and values.
• Open and direct communication.
• Dealing with issues and conflicts as they arise in a direct, timely and open-minded way.
When conflict arises;
Remember any human system is also an emotional system with a long, complicated history, working in real-time. In any emotional system that is subject to many and varied opinions and views, a fair and timely process will offer safety and predictability and more importantly a swift solution.
• Establish a fair process
• Build in safety and predictability so individuals will know what to expect
• Get buy-in from parties
• Use it!
Notes on a good, fair process;
Here are steps to follow in managing any conflict:
Ground rules
• Who are the critical decision makers?
• How will we make this decision?
• How long will we give to this?
• What are the rules of engagement?
Initial Positions
• Statement of problem
• Statement of each parties position
Interests
• What does each party really care about?
• What is their motivation?
• This answers the question ´why´?
Create solutions
• "Out of the box" thinking
• Invent options
• Brainstorm
Get objective criteria for each option
• Reality check
• What is the industry standard?
• What are the requirements for that position?
• How do we review that strategy?
Reaching an agreement
• Open discussion of the choices
• Weigh the options
• Make the decision.
My basic premise is that to counter conflict, you need a rational approach of patience & calm. You have to work out what is happening that is contributing to the problem and change it. Easier said than done, maybe! However, by getting to the root causes of the conflict, you not only relieve current conflicts but you are also more likely to prevent recurrences. For example, if you keep having conflict in your management team, it is possible that you might discover that the cause of your upset is not their behavior but your unrealistic expectations. By modifying your standards, you might find that the conflict in the team no longer bothers you or even better, those conflicts result in the more successful outcomes that you could ever have imagined. .
Until next week…
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
The most successful teams and companies have spontaneous and varied outlets for new ideas, innovations and approaches, however, it is also however these creative ideas, innovations and approaches that can be the very ingredients to conflict!
Therefore it is probable that the two greatest skillsets that will directly affect the success and longevity of your business are not only strategic planning but also conflict management! Having been inadvertently on the sidelines of a major conflict between two parties at the week-end and in my work as an Executive Performance Coach – seeing the stress and behavioural barriers to success that ensue, I know this to be true.
You´ve probably heard the saying "the bone is strongest where the break heals" (that is actually medically true!), the same applies to relationships (business or otherwise!), and this may, actually, give organizations a competitive edge. Unresolved conflicts are harmful and put a business at risk. Companies are often comprised of emotional hot houses and systems that are likely to have conflicts at some point or another. Several studies on M&A deals suggest that the largest number fail because of lack of conflict regulation processes. I have observed that those who do well are those who have found ways to regulate and appreciate differences of opinion even and especially if they are potentially explosive. These companies enjoy a competitive advantage, as they are better able to work together, trust each other, and react faster to the changing economic environment. The resulting outcome also leads to better, wiser decisions.
So if you have a conflict management process, fabulous! If not a few pointers which may assist;
• Conflict is normal; differences of opinion are healthy
• Managed conflicts are beneficial
• Build self confidence in emerging leaders
• Strengthen bonds
• Create rich diversity, more options
• Must be dealt with quickly and fairly
• Process is as important as outcome
• Hard bargaining is a poor second to interest based negotiations
Best practices to prevent conflicts:
• Clear strong leadership that is meritocracy based.
• Good employment policies: compensation, employment, exit and entry, reviews.
• Formalized meetings.
• Strong, effective governance with a truly independent board.
• Formalized meetings for sharing and understanding the collective and individual beliefs and values.
• Open and direct communication.
• Dealing with issues and conflicts as they arise in a direct, timely and open-minded way.
When conflict arises;
Remember any human system is also an emotional system with a long, complicated history, working in real-time. In any emotional system that is subject to many and varied opinions and views, a fair and timely process will offer safety and predictability and more importantly a swift solution.
• Establish a fair process
• Build in safety and predictability so individuals will know what to expect
• Get buy-in from parties
• Use it!
Notes on a good, fair process;
Here are steps to follow in managing any conflict:
Ground rules
• Who are the critical decision makers?
• How will we make this decision?
• How long will we give to this?
• What are the rules of engagement?
Initial Positions
• Statement of problem
• Statement of each parties position
Interests
• What does each party really care about?
• What is their motivation?
• This answers the question ´why´?
Create solutions
• "Out of the box" thinking
• Invent options
• Brainstorm
Get objective criteria for each option
• Reality check
• What is the industry standard?
• What are the requirements for that position?
• How do we review that strategy?
Reaching an agreement
• Open discussion of the choices
• Weigh the options
• Make the decision.
My basic premise is that to counter conflict, you need a rational approach of patience & calm. You have to work out what is happening that is contributing to the problem and change it. Easier said than done, maybe! However, by getting to the root causes of the conflict, you not only relieve current conflicts but you are also more likely to prevent recurrences. For example, if you keep having conflict in your management team, it is possible that you might discover that the cause of your upset is not their behavior but your unrealistic expectations. By modifying your standards, you might find that the conflict in the team no longer bothers you or even better, those conflicts result in the more successful outcomes that you could ever have imagined. .
Until next week…
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Can't stop change...
Being an Activist!
Be really honest, are there a few days in your life when you want to hide in your office and ignore the world? Hope that no-one will come and find you, or ask you for anything, be it an opinion, a signature, a decision, an agreement to get a new photocopier? Whatever – it is called being human and happens to us all.
Being the leader of an organisation, regardless of its size, does take a huge amount of energy, and responsibility and requires you to be active – either physically or mentally - whether you like it or not.
Now here’s the thing. That is why you are in the position of leadership right now. That is why you are in the top 2% of the population. That is why people want to follow you and be guided by you. You have already shown your tenacity and energy in order to have got into the position that you are in. So feel good about that! A very few percentage of the population are willing to be brave enough, active enough or maybe responsible enough to take on a leadership role – to set up and drive a company, to head up a group of people, to turn an idea into a business.
Here’s the catch.
Unfortunately you are only as good as your last action. What I mean by that is that now that you have made it to the ‘top’ or somewhere close, you cannot revert to a passive way of life and stay being successful. It just doesn’t work. I am sure that we have all known those managers of the past who have got to the position that they think they deserve(!) and then sit back on their laurels using power and status alone to remain in position. Do they add value to the business? Probably little. They might do enough to keep the status quo, but not a lot more. They know how to work the system, and stay out of the firing line. In the end, neither the company or they feel good about the situation. It doesn’t work for anyone.
As a successful leader you find that you have to remain ACTIVE in all that you do. Talk passionately, question the status quo, find out what the competition is doing, employ another great asset, think beyond tomorrow. The list is literally endless, which is inspiring but can be quite scary too. However, how do you feel at the end of the day when you have been active throughout? I would hope that words spring to mind such as achievement, higher self esteem and satisfaction. It must be worth it as you will go back and do it all over again tomorrow. Won’t you?
Please do recognise that there are some days you need to re-group, we just don’t have all that energy required – that is normal! The trick is to recognise this – and allow yourself to have a day of ‘re-grouping’. Just don’t make the big decisions on this day!
So – how do you find ways to continue to be an Activist, without completely wearing yourselves out? Here are some thoughts.
Firstly, enjoy what you do. I am sure that we can think about something you have been hugely involved in, whether it is mending a motorbike, working out a puzzle, painting a picture or a house, and the time has just disappeared. It is wonderful to be so involved that you give it your all without stopping, or even feeling tired (until afterwards at least!). Does work still do that for you?
Secondly, you don’t have to go it alone. Employing some people who are like minded and can be just as active as you, enables you to pass on the gauntlet without doing it all by yourself. Having used your passion to bring them on board will pass on that energy and away they go.
It does get easier too. Luckily, we humans do learn as we go along, so that the tremendous amount of energy we employ in doing something for the first time, requires slight less each time that we do it. So being active actually increases our comfort zone. That’s a relief isn’t it?
Don’t waste your energy on valueless things. So many of us sit through meetings where there is so much potential talent sitting around the table, and none of it gets used. Look in your diary and highlight the events where your passion and your energy are required and make them a priority, minimising the energy-sapping appointments.
Look at yourself at times – and make sure that you are not doing the ‘power – status’ thing – you may feel good for a day, but not sure that it adds value to you or your company!
Finally – a thought, in the words of Carmel McConnell, an inspiring activist and author – ‘You have loads of talent. Let’s face it, most days it just sits waiting inside you.’ So what are you waiting for?
Until next week
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Be really honest, are there a few days in your life when you want to hide in your office and ignore the world? Hope that no-one will come and find you, or ask you for anything, be it an opinion, a signature, a decision, an agreement to get a new photocopier? Whatever – it is called being human and happens to us all.
Being the leader of an organisation, regardless of its size, does take a huge amount of energy, and responsibility and requires you to be active – either physically or mentally - whether you like it or not.
Now here’s the thing. That is why you are in the position of leadership right now. That is why you are in the top 2% of the population. That is why people want to follow you and be guided by you. You have already shown your tenacity and energy in order to have got into the position that you are in. So feel good about that! A very few percentage of the population are willing to be brave enough, active enough or maybe responsible enough to take on a leadership role – to set up and drive a company, to head up a group of people, to turn an idea into a business.
Here’s the catch.
Unfortunately you are only as good as your last action. What I mean by that is that now that you have made it to the ‘top’ or somewhere close, you cannot revert to a passive way of life and stay being successful. It just doesn’t work. I am sure that we have all known those managers of the past who have got to the position that they think they deserve(!) and then sit back on their laurels using power and status alone to remain in position. Do they add value to the business? Probably little. They might do enough to keep the status quo, but not a lot more. They know how to work the system, and stay out of the firing line. In the end, neither the company or they feel good about the situation. It doesn’t work for anyone.
As a successful leader you find that you have to remain ACTIVE in all that you do. Talk passionately, question the status quo, find out what the competition is doing, employ another great asset, think beyond tomorrow. The list is literally endless, which is inspiring but can be quite scary too. However, how do you feel at the end of the day when you have been active throughout? I would hope that words spring to mind such as achievement, higher self esteem and satisfaction. It must be worth it as you will go back and do it all over again tomorrow. Won’t you?
Please do recognise that there are some days you need to re-group, we just don’t have all that energy required – that is normal! The trick is to recognise this – and allow yourself to have a day of ‘re-grouping’. Just don’t make the big decisions on this day!
So – how do you find ways to continue to be an Activist, without completely wearing yourselves out? Here are some thoughts.
Firstly, enjoy what you do. I am sure that we can think about something you have been hugely involved in, whether it is mending a motorbike, working out a puzzle, painting a picture or a house, and the time has just disappeared. It is wonderful to be so involved that you give it your all without stopping, or even feeling tired (until afterwards at least!). Does work still do that for you?
Secondly, you don’t have to go it alone. Employing some people who are like minded and can be just as active as you, enables you to pass on the gauntlet without doing it all by yourself. Having used your passion to bring them on board will pass on that energy and away they go.
It does get easier too. Luckily, we humans do learn as we go along, so that the tremendous amount of energy we employ in doing something for the first time, requires slight less each time that we do it. So being active actually increases our comfort zone. That’s a relief isn’t it?
Don’t waste your energy on valueless things. So many of us sit through meetings where there is so much potential talent sitting around the table, and none of it gets used. Look in your diary and highlight the events where your passion and your energy are required and make them a priority, minimising the energy-sapping appointments.
Look at yourself at times – and make sure that you are not doing the ‘power – status’ thing – you may feel good for a day, but not sure that it adds value to you or your company!
Finally – a thought, in the words of Carmel McConnell, an inspiring activist and author – ‘You have loads of talent. Let’s face it, most days it just sits waiting inside you.’ So what are you waiting for?
Until next week
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
‘CEO with multiple personalities – please apply’
“I have a dream….” Heard that before? The most quoted speeches about leadership around the globe are those that have provided inspiration and significant change– inspiring groups of people, workers even nations in some cases. Whether it be Martin Luther King, Churchill, or Mandela, they are all recognised for outstanding leadership. Many of us aspire to being half as talented at articulating, mesmerising and leading I am sure! However, for you CEOs and equivalents out there, you realise being a leader is not just about make fantastic speeches, in fact a significant part of your role and day requires a completely different form of leadership.
Myles Downey, a coaching guru of our time, neatly articulates that in order to be a successful CEO, you need to be a leader, a manager AND a coach, regardless of your business being 2 or 2000 employees.
Stop for a moment and cast your mind across your diary. Think through your day and the different, varied facets of your role. Typically it may include speaking at a conference or team event (Leader), a one-to-one with your Marketing Director (Coach) and then checking on progress of your latest product (Manager). Are you beginning to recognise the need for the split personality now?! I am not encouraging you all to be schizophrenic, but I do want you to recognise that it does not take just one type of behaviour to succeed at the top. This is what we have to work on (unless you are naturally schizophrenic that is). In my experience working with CEOs, you will naturally have one of the three personalities as a natural strength. The knack is being aware of the need for the other two when certain situations occur. Do not expect to shine in all three, but ensure that you do have the skills to vary your style to create the best outcome for all events.
Those most successful in the role of CEOs tend to be those that are sensitive to recognising the different roles needed at different times in the organisation.
Let us look at the three styles required:
Leader – This is the person that inspires the team, the troops, by articulating a clear message for everyone to get behind. They will be continuously and tirelessly talking about their vision, how to get to success and driving people to do so. Behaviours will include clarity of thought and communication, together with ability to make tough decisions.
Manager – Here is the person that makes things happen. They ensure that the vision becomes reality through getting teams set up and working with them to continually progress. They will be creative in getting people to move from ‘what’ to ‘how’, in making dreams reality They will be able to prioritise and keeping the momentum going, removing obstacles as they go. They will also be a good team player.
Coach – Here is the person that listens and creates a culture where everyone takes responsibility for the success and progress of the organisation. They will continually create situations for people to express their thoughts, enthusiasms and even worries in order to get responsibility spread throughout the organisation. They will listen and watch and encourage others to move forward and will be continually positive in outlook, having put status to one side.
So – firstly, identify which is your forte? Which of the three do you instantly recognise is your natural behaviour? Incidentally, many of you may instantly think it is Leader, although this is often not the case. You may HAVE to frequently take on this role based on your responsibilities, but that does not mean you are not a natural coach underneath that.
Secondly – recognise when the other two personalities would be better at different events, such as a one-to-one, or a review meeting. What is important to identify what different behaviours are best at these events in order to get the greatest outcome.
Thirdly – practise all three in order for you to seamlessly move from one to another as the need arises. A suggestion for you - Write down two or three words that clarify for you what Leader, Manager and Coach is. For example
Leader – inspiring, consistent, tough
Manager – team player, obstacle remover
Coach – even playing field, listener
And carry this with you in your diary/PDA.
Before you go to an event, pick which ever of the styles you see as appropriate and consciously try to take on that persona – give yourself feedback after the event, so that you continually improve as you go. The greater diversity you have as a CEO, you create greater opportunity for success.
I would like to leave you with a quote that may inspire you to try these techniques out, from one of the great leaders of our time:
“Personally, I’m always ready to learn, though I do not always like being taught.” - Winston Churchill
Until next week,
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Myles Downey, a coaching guru of our time, neatly articulates that in order to be a successful CEO, you need to be a leader, a manager AND a coach, regardless of your business being 2 or 2000 employees.
Stop for a moment and cast your mind across your diary. Think through your day and the different, varied facets of your role. Typically it may include speaking at a conference or team event (Leader), a one-to-one with your Marketing Director (Coach) and then checking on progress of your latest product (Manager). Are you beginning to recognise the need for the split personality now?! I am not encouraging you all to be schizophrenic, but I do want you to recognise that it does not take just one type of behaviour to succeed at the top. This is what we have to work on (unless you are naturally schizophrenic that is). In my experience working with CEOs, you will naturally have one of the three personalities as a natural strength. The knack is being aware of the need for the other two when certain situations occur. Do not expect to shine in all three, but ensure that you do have the skills to vary your style to create the best outcome for all events.
Those most successful in the role of CEOs tend to be those that are sensitive to recognising the different roles needed at different times in the organisation.
Let us look at the three styles required:
Leader – This is the person that inspires the team, the troops, by articulating a clear message for everyone to get behind. They will be continuously and tirelessly talking about their vision, how to get to success and driving people to do so. Behaviours will include clarity of thought and communication, together with ability to make tough decisions.
Manager – Here is the person that makes things happen. They ensure that the vision becomes reality through getting teams set up and working with them to continually progress. They will be creative in getting people to move from ‘what’ to ‘how’, in making dreams reality They will be able to prioritise and keeping the momentum going, removing obstacles as they go. They will also be a good team player.
Coach – Here is the person that listens and creates a culture where everyone takes responsibility for the success and progress of the organisation. They will continually create situations for people to express their thoughts, enthusiasms and even worries in order to get responsibility spread throughout the organisation. They will listen and watch and encourage others to move forward and will be continually positive in outlook, having put status to one side.
So – firstly, identify which is your forte? Which of the three do you instantly recognise is your natural behaviour? Incidentally, many of you may instantly think it is Leader, although this is often not the case. You may HAVE to frequently take on this role based on your responsibilities, but that does not mean you are not a natural coach underneath that.
Secondly – recognise when the other two personalities would be better at different events, such as a one-to-one, or a review meeting. What is important to identify what different behaviours are best at these events in order to get the greatest outcome.
Thirdly – practise all three in order for you to seamlessly move from one to another as the need arises. A suggestion for you - Write down two or three words that clarify for you what Leader, Manager and Coach is. For example
Leader – inspiring, consistent, tough
Manager – team player, obstacle remover
Coach – even playing field, listener
And carry this with you in your diary/PDA.
Before you go to an event, pick which ever of the styles you see as appropriate and consciously try to take on that persona – give yourself feedback after the event, so that you continually improve as you go. The greater diversity you have as a CEO, you create greater opportunity for success.
I would like to leave you with a quote that may inspire you to try these techniques out, from one of the great leaders of our time:
“Personally, I’m always ready to learn, though I do not always like being taught.” - Winston Churchill
Until next week,
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
The choices we make....
This week maybe I (or more appropriately my friends) have got to that ‘certain age’.
Two of my close friends have just decided to pack in their very highly skilled, senior professional jobs; one to go travelling, the other to do something different, not knowing what that is quite yet! One was a Partner in a law firm, the other on the Board of an international pharmaceutical company. Both of them had been very focused about climbing the corporate ladder and had achieved much during their 15 or so years at work. However, they both said independently, that the decision to pack it all in without knowing where they would go next was amazingly easy. Considering both the individuals had always taken any decisions to date very seriously and analytically, I was amazed that they both were comfortable to ‘abandon ship’ and just see what happens.
To dramatically change their life and lifestyle at this stage takes considerable courage, and some of you may say that they are bonkers in doing so. Maybe so in some eyes! However, it does highlight that however important you may be in business, however deep your responsibilities are (which are likely to be considerable as a Leader), you DO have a choice in terms of your life. Yes – you really do, as these two have shown me at least!
Now, I am not encouraging all of you out there to abandon your careers, companies and even families just for the hell of it! However, there are some interesting things that are worth considering, as a result of their decisions.
What assumptions are you making?
Both friends said that they never really gave themselves the chance to stop and think about what they really wanted when caught up in corporate life. What was interesting was that they often thought that they did – when on holiday, or talking to their Coach or family. But in reality, this was always within the confines of certain given parameters; incidentally parameters that they had given themselves, sometimes unconsciously. Things like mortgage, children’s education, business dependency are the obvious ones that burst forth initially. Can you think what assumptions, or parameters that you have set yourself in business and at home? Are they real, relevant, or are they just there from habit? For example, Nick (one of the friends) always assumed that he ‘had’ to work to pay for his life, house, family etc. An obvious one I know! However, when he did sit down with pen, paper and a smart Accountant, he realised that he could manage a year of considerably smaller income without doing real damage to his pension, or lifestyle. The same goes for business – are there some assumptions that you are making about your competition, your costs, your revenues that actually could be challenged, without being detrimental to the business? Try to list all those assumptions you are making – you may be surprised at how extensive the list is, when you dig beyond the obvious ones.
Take Courage
The amazing Karren Brady says in her book ‘Playing to win’ that “Courage stems from confidence but stands alone as a tremendous asset”. She is so right. Courage is so often driven by a very strong goal or ambition, and easily taken away from us by our very own actions. Sometimes, it seems easier to hide behind some self-authored parameters that encourage us to say ‘Well I would love to do that, but I just can’t’. There is no such thing as ‘can’t’ when driven by your desire to do something – so look for that ambition that you really, really want. What is getting in the way? Is that your choice – really?
Look into the Future
When you are 80 and sitting in your chair, looking back over your life to date – what will you like to have said that you have achieved? Is it too late now to change your life to do it? Probably not! Every week, we all read amazing stories of octogenarians running Marathons, Pensioners setting up Charities in India, retired folk returning to business to set up a multi million pound Vodka business – so never think it is too late if you have the desire! So as not to be ‘age-ist’, you may think you are too young in some areas, but then consider the 18 year old American Girl who has just completed her final ascent up Everest, and is now the Youngest Human to have completed the Seven Summits – what next!
Do it for the right reasons
A word of caution. Being stuck on the M25 on a rainy, dark Friday night is probably not the most sensible time to consider changing your life! Going back to my two friends, they had both made the decision to change when things were going WELL for them. Doing so enables you to think through various options in a much more objective frame of mind. Again, from a business perspective, when you lose out to a competitor, it is probably not sensible to completely throw out your product or service that night, or sack the team for that matter. Look for when times are good to review where you are.
Lastly – if you are happy doing what you are doing – that is GREAT! Every now and then, it is worth giving yourself time to reflect on your choices in how you live life and do business. It may just help you realise how lucky you are – or is it luck, given the choices that you have made?!
Until next week…
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Two of my close friends have just decided to pack in their very highly skilled, senior professional jobs; one to go travelling, the other to do something different, not knowing what that is quite yet! One was a Partner in a law firm, the other on the Board of an international pharmaceutical company. Both of them had been very focused about climbing the corporate ladder and had achieved much during their 15 or so years at work. However, they both said independently, that the decision to pack it all in without knowing where they would go next was amazingly easy. Considering both the individuals had always taken any decisions to date very seriously and analytically, I was amazed that they both were comfortable to ‘abandon ship’ and just see what happens.
To dramatically change their life and lifestyle at this stage takes considerable courage, and some of you may say that they are bonkers in doing so. Maybe so in some eyes! However, it does highlight that however important you may be in business, however deep your responsibilities are (which are likely to be considerable as a Leader), you DO have a choice in terms of your life. Yes – you really do, as these two have shown me at least!
Now, I am not encouraging all of you out there to abandon your careers, companies and even families just for the hell of it! However, there are some interesting things that are worth considering, as a result of their decisions.
What assumptions are you making?
Both friends said that they never really gave themselves the chance to stop and think about what they really wanted when caught up in corporate life. What was interesting was that they often thought that they did – when on holiday, or talking to their Coach or family. But in reality, this was always within the confines of certain given parameters; incidentally parameters that they had given themselves, sometimes unconsciously. Things like mortgage, children’s education, business dependency are the obvious ones that burst forth initially. Can you think what assumptions, or parameters that you have set yourself in business and at home? Are they real, relevant, or are they just there from habit? For example, Nick (one of the friends) always assumed that he ‘had’ to work to pay for his life, house, family etc. An obvious one I know! However, when he did sit down with pen, paper and a smart Accountant, he realised that he could manage a year of considerably smaller income without doing real damage to his pension, or lifestyle. The same goes for business – are there some assumptions that you are making about your competition, your costs, your revenues that actually could be challenged, without being detrimental to the business? Try to list all those assumptions you are making – you may be surprised at how extensive the list is, when you dig beyond the obvious ones.
Take Courage
The amazing Karren Brady says in her book ‘Playing to win’ that “Courage stems from confidence but stands alone as a tremendous asset”. She is so right. Courage is so often driven by a very strong goal or ambition, and easily taken away from us by our very own actions. Sometimes, it seems easier to hide behind some self-authored parameters that encourage us to say ‘Well I would love to do that, but I just can’t’. There is no such thing as ‘can’t’ when driven by your desire to do something – so look for that ambition that you really, really want. What is getting in the way? Is that your choice – really?
Look into the Future
When you are 80 and sitting in your chair, looking back over your life to date – what will you like to have said that you have achieved? Is it too late now to change your life to do it? Probably not! Every week, we all read amazing stories of octogenarians running Marathons, Pensioners setting up Charities in India, retired folk returning to business to set up a multi million pound Vodka business – so never think it is too late if you have the desire! So as not to be ‘age-ist’, you may think you are too young in some areas, but then consider the 18 year old American Girl who has just completed her final ascent up Everest, and is now the Youngest Human to have completed the Seven Summits – what next!
Do it for the right reasons
A word of caution. Being stuck on the M25 on a rainy, dark Friday night is probably not the most sensible time to consider changing your life! Going back to my two friends, they had both made the decision to change when things were going WELL for them. Doing so enables you to think through various options in a much more objective frame of mind. Again, from a business perspective, when you lose out to a competitor, it is probably not sensible to completely throw out your product or service that night, or sack the team for that matter. Look for when times are good to review where you are.
Lastly – if you are happy doing what you are doing – that is GREAT! Every now and then, it is worth giving yourself time to reflect on your choices in how you live life and do business. It may just help you realise how lucky you are – or is it luck, given the choices that you have made?!
Until next week…
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Start with yourself............
‘Hello – is that me in there?’
Recently, I received a frantic call from a guy that had been a client for many years, Mark. “Look – I have read all the books that are on the shelf about being Creative and Entrepreneurial, and done all the things that it said – but see – I am still just ME’ My temptation was to ask “So what is the problem?”, but restrained myself, to listen further. Mark was so frustrated, based on the assumption that by reading several books, anyone can change – and it just was not happening for him. Well, was it really a problem?
As we all know, there is so much information out there in the world of communication and media, to encourage us to be something that we are not, nor will ever be. (This is probably because we don’t really want to be, but daren’t admit it!). Books that attempt to motivate us to be better business people, thinkers, entrepreneurs, even dressers; DVDs to make us into athletes, or Mr Universe. You could miss your plane by two hours just by looking at the possibilities in any airport shop! Just pick up the book/video etc. and away we go to change…. Or your money back?!
Well not quite! One of the key factors that is often forgotten in the furore of transforming ourselves and/or lives is the starting point. ‘Who am I to start with?’
If you are a woman, I am pretty sure that you can relate to the ‘Model’ look. You cram yourself into a new dress in Kate Moss’s new collection in Top Shop, and then feel desperate, as you just don’t look like anything like her, even though you have all her stuff on from top to toe! Let’s be honest, unless you happen to be size 6 (UK) already – you are never going to look like her – sorry! However, you can improve and enhance your natural look by buying some clothes that maybe make you more slim lined, with a long tunic etc., if that is what you are really hoping for. Now that will work!
That goes for the same message in business. If you are an introvert, you are not going to become extrovert by reading one book. However, that book can help you to discover what it is about extroverts that you admire, and what behaviours could you enhance of your own, to move towards that feeling? Now that is worthwhile!
As I did with Mark, my client, ask yourself a simple but critically important question,. Simply, ‘What makes me Me?’ For the answer, get some feedback from a variety of sources, not just your latest discussion in the board room. Personalities have been developing since birth, so even your school reports will unlock some interesting features. Feedback from colleagues, family, different friends. Get a feeling and picture of who you are and feel comfortable with that, as a starting point.
Then think about the specific attributes you admire from reading the articles, books etc. Which of those really resonate with you? When you read or watch, your body will let you know the important factors. You should feel something in your stomach or maybe neck, some form of internal light will go on. For example, when reading about Mountain climbers, it is their ability to focus, or to be patient to wait for the right moment to climb, or to be able to work on their own? Focus in on that one thing, and recognise that this is the key factor you are interested in.
Going back to Mark – his feedback had highlighted that he was excellent at making things happen, and working with others. Even at school, he was often Form Captain and headed up the Debate Society, recognising his ability to take actions forward. He had already realised that he was not a natural at coming up with ideas. Did he really want to do this? After a little soul searching, he admitted that it wasn’t that which inspired him. It was more about being courageous in taking ideas and making them happen. This is something that he really could see himself doing. So, his plan was to go and find people in the organisation that had some great ideas, listen more intently to them and work with them to make things happen. This REALLY fired him up and gave him the courage to change. However, this change was enhancing his skills and behaviours and not making him into something that he was not.
Please recognise that these books, dresses, DVDs are excellent at inspiring us and motivating us to make changes, which is a good thing! However, be realistic with your starting point. Don’t set yourself up to fail – set yourself up to be a winner, by working out who you really are on the starting blocks.
Until next week,
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Recently, I received a frantic call from a guy that had been a client for many years, Mark. “Look – I have read all the books that are on the shelf about being Creative and Entrepreneurial, and done all the things that it said – but see – I am still just ME’ My temptation was to ask “So what is the problem?”, but restrained myself, to listen further. Mark was so frustrated, based on the assumption that by reading several books, anyone can change – and it just was not happening for him. Well, was it really a problem?
As we all know, there is so much information out there in the world of communication and media, to encourage us to be something that we are not, nor will ever be. (This is probably because we don’t really want to be, but daren’t admit it!). Books that attempt to motivate us to be better business people, thinkers, entrepreneurs, even dressers; DVDs to make us into athletes, or Mr Universe. You could miss your plane by two hours just by looking at the possibilities in any airport shop! Just pick up the book/video etc. and away we go to change…. Or your money back?!
Well not quite! One of the key factors that is often forgotten in the furore of transforming ourselves and/or lives is the starting point. ‘Who am I to start with?’
If you are a woman, I am pretty sure that you can relate to the ‘Model’ look. You cram yourself into a new dress in Kate Moss’s new collection in Top Shop, and then feel desperate, as you just don’t look like anything like her, even though you have all her stuff on from top to toe! Let’s be honest, unless you happen to be size 6 (UK) already – you are never going to look like her – sorry! However, you can improve and enhance your natural look by buying some clothes that maybe make you more slim lined, with a long tunic etc., if that is what you are really hoping for. Now that will work!
That goes for the same message in business. If you are an introvert, you are not going to become extrovert by reading one book. However, that book can help you to discover what it is about extroverts that you admire, and what behaviours could you enhance of your own, to move towards that feeling? Now that is worthwhile!
As I did with Mark, my client, ask yourself a simple but critically important question,. Simply, ‘What makes me Me?’ For the answer, get some feedback from a variety of sources, not just your latest discussion in the board room. Personalities have been developing since birth, so even your school reports will unlock some interesting features. Feedback from colleagues, family, different friends. Get a feeling and picture of who you are and feel comfortable with that, as a starting point.
Then think about the specific attributes you admire from reading the articles, books etc. Which of those really resonate with you? When you read or watch, your body will let you know the important factors. You should feel something in your stomach or maybe neck, some form of internal light will go on. For example, when reading about Mountain climbers, it is their ability to focus, or to be patient to wait for the right moment to climb, or to be able to work on their own? Focus in on that one thing, and recognise that this is the key factor you are interested in.
Going back to Mark – his feedback had highlighted that he was excellent at making things happen, and working with others. Even at school, he was often Form Captain and headed up the Debate Society, recognising his ability to take actions forward. He had already realised that he was not a natural at coming up with ideas. Did he really want to do this? After a little soul searching, he admitted that it wasn’t that which inspired him. It was more about being courageous in taking ideas and making them happen. This is something that he really could see himself doing. So, his plan was to go and find people in the organisation that had some great ideas, listen more intently to them and work with them to make things happen. This REALLY fired him up and gave him the courage to change. However, this change was enhancing his skills and behaviours and not making him into something that he was not.
Please recognise that these books, dresses, DVDs are excellent at inspiring us and motivating us to make changes, which is a good thing! However, be realistic with your starting point. Don’t set yourself up to fail – set yourself up to be a winner, by working out who you really are on the starting blocks.
Until next week,
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
‘Practise makes perfect’
I don’t know about you, but I was thrown that phrase endlessly as a child, as I attempted (rather badly) to play the piano. I clearly was not a natural, but nevertheless enjoyed the gradual improvement over the (many) years. My Grandmother had been a professional in the musical world and was so keen for one of her family to follow suit. It was not to be. However, in the many patient hours that she spent with me I am left with a vivid and important lesson in life, rather than just music. She made me realise that however good you are at something, you still need to practise continually in order to improve. I was fascinated by the hours and hours that she would dedicate to sitting in front of her beloved Bechstein, playing again and again a phrase of music until she was happy with it. She would head off to the recording studios just in order to record, hear and re-record tunes in order to continually improve. Her dedication was awesome from a child’s point of view!
Everyday we see this with current musicians, elite sports people, actors and comedians. I have recently been working with a national rugby team and again that ‘awesome’ amount of time into practising their skills is admirable – and what is more – they know it will make the difference between them and their competition. We all know that there are many other things that going into the hat when excelling at any skill, such as natural talent, technique etc., but there is still masses of room for practise. Why do you think Johnny Wilkinson spends many hours every day kicking for goal? Why do you think Helen Mirren spent hours practicing her vocal range as the Queen? Why do you think international rowers get up in the dark and cold to skiff up and down the Thames? All for the same reason – to continually improve towards their goal.
So, let’s equate this to the business world. As a leader in any size organisation, you have surely got to your position due to dedication as well as talent and skill. Everyday I have the joy of working with many very successful people and realise the hours that they put into their jobs in order to for the company and/or themselves to be more successful. BUT – how much do you actually practise your skills?
Working with both leaders in sports and business, there is one difference that continues to intrigue and amaze me. In simple terms, sports people practise their moves, techniques etc., before they let themselves lose on their competition. Do we do the same in business?
Let’s just think about an important meeting coming up – it may be with a key customer, supplier, an appraisal, a board meeting, the AGM. What do you practise before the event and how? In many cases, particularly if it is a conference, you may have written out and practised your speech. However, have you practised your technique in answering? What about practising your rapport building with your clients? When did you last practise running a board meeting? Have you practised ‘passing’ between your colleagues?
Last year, I was working with an interesting guy who has wanted to improve his relationship with fellow board members. He did not have a real business issue with them, but wanted to feel more natural with them, and build greater rapport. I therefore observed him conduct several meetings of different styles and then, upon his request, gave him feedback on specific areas that he had highlighted. Over the next two weeks he literally practised the techniques, with the help of his colleagues. Much to their surprise, he asked them for very specific feedback, and acted upon it through the following meetings. He admitted that it felt very strange to begin with, but was delighted with the results of a dramatically different and closer team. ‘Practising’ is a now a way of live in their board room, as they continue to reap the benefits.
So, if you want to continually improve, can you think of a specific area that you can practise? This may be you, the team, or you as an individual. If you know that you have a difficult meeting with a client coming up, don’t just talk about it, actually re-enact the meeting and practice all the techniques that you will need to get a positive outcome. Give each other very specific feedback and go through it again, until you feel that you have improved your technique. Practise building rapport with different people and see what impact it has. Practise motivating your kids at the weekend, just like you will practise your skills in golf or tennis. Give your brain a good workout, as it will respond as positively as a body workout!
One of the great learnings that we can take from the elite sports world is their ability to scrutinise everything that they do, learn from it, and practise it again, and again. In business, we tend to analyse our outcomes (revenues, costs, profit, processes etc), but we seem to shy away from scrutinising our behaviours and actions, in the same way. There is a business culture which often does not allow practise, as this almost admitting that things will go wrong. Let’s get real – things DO go wrong all the time! That is how we learn. The important lesson is to let things to go wrong when it is not critical to the business. So get practising, try things out, learn and try again. As Clive Woodward said during England’s glory days at Rugby, “Winning doesn’t happen in a straight line”.
Enjoy the art of practising and the game of winning!
Until next week,
Claire Norman is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Everyday we see this with current musicians, elite sports people, actors and comedians. I have recently been working with a national rugby team and again that ‘awesome’ amount of time into practising their skills is admirable – and what is more – they know it will make the difference between them and their competition. We all know that there are many other things that going into the hat when excelling at any skill, such as natural talent, technique etc., but there is still masses of room for practise. Why do you think Johnny Wilkinson spends many hours every day kicking for goal? Why do you think Helen Mirren spent hours practicing her vocal range as the Queen? Why do you think international rowers get up in the dark and cold to skiff up and down the Thames? All for the same reason – to continually improve towards their goal.
So, let’s equate this to the business world. As a leader in any size organisation, you have surely got to your position due to dedication as well as talent and skill. Everyday I have the joy of working with many very successful people and realise the hours that they put into their jobs in order to for the company and/or themselves to be more successful. BUT – how much do you actually practise your skills?
Working with both leaders in sports and business, there is one difference that continues to intrigue and amaze me. In simple terms, sports people practise their moves, techniques etc., before they let themselves lose on their competition. Do we do the same in business?
Let’s just think about an important meeting coming up – it may be with a key customer, supplier, an appraisal, a board meeting, the AGM. What do you practise before the event and how? In many cases, particularly if it is a conference, you may have written out and practised your speech. However, have you practised your technique in answering? What about practising your rapport building with your clients? When did you last practise running a board meeting? Have you practised ‘passing’ between your colleagues?
Last year, I was working with an interesting guy who has wanted to improve his relationship with fellow board members. He did not have a real business issue with them, but wanted to feel more natural with them, and build greater rapport. I therefore observed him conduct several meetings of different styles and then, upon his request, gave him feedback on specific areas that he had highlighted. Over the next two weeks he literally practised the techniques, with the help of his colleagues. Much to their surprise, he asked them for very specific feedback, and acted upon it through the following meetings. He admitted that it felt very strange to begin with, but was delighted with the results of a dramatically different and closer team. ‘Practising’ is a now a way of live in their board room, as they continue to reap the benefits.
So, if you want to continually improve, can you think of a specific area that you can practise? This may be you, the team, or you as an individual. If you know that you have a difficult meeting with a client coming up, don’t just talk about it, actually re-enact the meeting and practice all the techniques that you will need to get a positive outcome. Give each other very specific feedback and go through it again, until you feel that you have improved your technique. Practise building rapport with different people and see what impact it has. Practise motivating your kids at the weekend, just like you will practise your skills in golf or tennis. Give your brain a good workout, as it will respond as positively as a body workout!
One of the great learnings that we can take from the elite sports world is their ability to scrutinise everything that they do, learn from it, and practise it again, and again. In business, we tend to analyse our outcomes (revenues, costs, profit, processes etc), but we seem to shy away from scrutinising our behaviours and actions, in the same way. There is a business culture which often does not allow practise, as this almost admitting that things will go wrong. Let’s get real – things DO go wrong all the time! That is how we learn. The important lesson is to let things to go wrong when it is not critical to the business. So get practising, try things out, learn and try again. As Clive Woodward said during England’s glory days at Rugby, “Winning doesn’t happen in a straight line”.
Enjoy the art of practising and the game of winning!
Until next week,
Claire Norman is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Balanced Decisions
As you start to read this article, just quickly think about how many other bits of paper, articles, emails, spreadsheets you have seen or been thrust at you today? Given the position that you are in, probably hundreds if not thousands. As a leader and someone in a senior position, you are likely to have to digest literally thousands of bits of data and information every day, in order to disseminate and make decisions; some of which may be critical to your business, job or life, or even someone’s else’s.
So – given the importance of some of this information, how do you ensure that it is accurate, or high quality and/or even useful for your purpose? In short, how do you sort the ‘wheat from the chaff’ in terms of information?
Due to the way our brain handles information, we can glean very different results from the same information – quite scary really! Let me give you an example. Many years ago, I used to work with a delightful but ruthlessly straight-talking Australian. When something ‘displeased’ her, however, rather than use her usual plain speaking she would generally say something like ‘oh how wonderful’ or ‘that’s fantastic’ with not a trace of sarcasm! Therefore the odd situation that she found herself in would be confused to say the least - especially as we were also seconded abroad at the time! Now, although some of the individuals she conversed with were given the same information – the opinions and decisions that people were making were literally poles apart! Often, we really don’t know whether or not we have been given complete, sufficient or indeed accurate information! But just like at work, we can choose to make a decision without the complete facts in front of us; in fact that is one of your great assets, as a Leader in all probability. We all use our values, experience, intuition and assumptions about people, about situations, about the countries we are seconded to and anything else we may deem relevant, to cast an opinion. In your working situation, it would be highly unusual to say that you have never made a decision, without the full facts in front of you, wouldn’t it? However, we all do it – sometimes successfully and sometimes not so. Be that as it may, the important lesson is to be AWARE of that judgement call. Ensure that you are fully cogniscent of how you arrived at your decision.
There are several pointers that can help;
Ask for the right information in the first place
Sounds very obvious, but as CEO or similar you are often the one that creates the need for information. This may be to back up some initiative, find out about new products, suppliers or competition, information about internal processes, systems or people etc. and often something to support a change somewhere. However, more often than not, your request will be taken literally as you are the boss. So, ask yourself – “have I asked for some balanced and open information, or data that will support my hunch/argument?”. As we know in politics seen in the daily papers, any amount of information can be produced to support a point of view! However, there are times when we genuinely want to understand different view points or information, so ensure that the question that you ask is sufficiently open enough to be valuable to your decision making.
Trust – how much do you trust the information source?
This is not meant to sound dark and sinister! However, it is likely that whoever you have asked to produce some information will have a certain viewpoint. It is extremely hard for them not to be biased towards their point of view when producing information. For example, asking both the Marketing Director and the Finance Director, what percentage increase will be needed next year in the Marketing Budget, will provide you with significantly different ‘data’ I would suggest! For balanced information, maybe pick them both.
Presentation of data and information
When you are given information to look at or listen to – really do tune in your senses in doing so. What I mean by that is look beyond the words, the information, to understand it further, as this is also where some clues are hidden. There are some phrases that you can spot that identify the difference between facts and viewpoints. Phrases such as ‘I believe’, and ‘it is obvious’, or ‘I think’ are all indications that you are getting more than just straight data. To practise, listen or watch the news today and see how much information you are given is straight fact in comparison to points of view – you may be surprised! Body language will also indicate their emotional involvement in their presentation, so watch and listen for these clues also.
Your own thinking process
As we have discussed before, your subconscious brain does a great job at filtering information in a way that it thinks it is going to be useful for you. Before you know it consciously, masses on information is deleted, distorted or generalised before you make a conscious note of it. However, as this is your brain, it is possible to ‘tee-up’ your subconscious and check that your filters are doing a good job! For example, you may well be presented with the monthly revenue figures on a regular basis and you will skim to the data that is of most interest to you. Your brain will be noting this and spot a trend – a path of least resistance to make it easier for you next time. However, this may mean you miss something very obvious! So – practise looking somewhere different each month to keep you attuned and able to notice anomalies more easily.
In summary, just like any mechanical part, our brain’s filtering system can always do with a service! There may not be a need to change anything, but taking it apart, giving it a shake up and oiling it so that it is fully operable can only help it be more effective and efficient. It also may also last longer too, which can only be a good thing!
Until next week
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
So – given the importance of some of this information, how do you ensure that it is accurate, or high quality and/or even useful for your purpose? In short, how do you sort the ‘wheat from the chaff’ in terms of information?
Due to the way our brain handles information, we can glean very different results from the same information – quite scary really! Let me give you an example. Many years ago, I used to work with a delightful but ruthlessly straight-talking Australian. When something ‘displeased’ her, however, rather than use her usual plain speaking she would generally say something like ‘oh how wonderful’ or ‘that’s fantastic’ with not a trace of sarcasm! Therefore the odd situation that she found herself in would be confused to say the least - especially as we were also seconded abroad at the time! Now, although some of the individuals she conversed with were given the same information – the opinions and decisions that people were making were literally poles apart! Often, we really don’t know whether or not we have been given complete, sufficient or indeed accurate information! But just like at work, we can choose to make a decision without the complete facts in front of us; in fact that is one of your great assets, as a Leader in all probability. We all use our values, experience, intuition and assumptions about people, about situations, about the countries we are seconded to and anything else we may deem relevant, to cast an opinion. In your working situation, it would be highly unusual to say that you have never made a decision, without the full facts in front of you, wouldn’t it? However, we all do it – sometimes successfully and sometimes not so. Be that as it may, the important lesson is to be AWARE of that judgement call. Ensure that you are fully cogniscent of how you arrived at your decision.
There are several pointers that can help;
Ask for the right information in the first place
Sounds very obvious, but as CEO or similar you are often the one that creates the need for information. This may be to back up some initiative, find out about new products, suppliers or competition, information about internal processes, systems or people etc. and often something to support a change somewhere. However, more often than not, your request will be taken literally as you are the boss. So, ask yourself – “have I asked for some balanced and open information, or data that will support my hunch/argument?”. As we know in politics seen in the daily papers, any amount of information can be produced to support a point of view! However, there are times when we genuinely want to understand different view points or information, so ensure that the question that you ask is sufficiently open enough to be valuable to your decision making.
Trust – how much do you trust the information source?
This is not meant to sound dark and sinister! However, it is likely that whoever you have asked to produce some information will have a certain viewpoint. It is extremely hard for them not to be biased towards their point of view when producing information. For example, asking both the Marketing Director and the Finance Director, what percentage increase will be needed next year in the Marketing Budget, will provide you with significantly different ‘data’ I would suggest! For balanced information, maybe pick them both.
Presentation of data and information
When you are given information to look at or listen to – really do tune in your senses in doing so. What I mean by that is look beyond the words, the information, to understand it further, as this is also where some clues are hidden. There are some phrases that you can spot that identify the difference between facts and viewpoints. Phrases such as ‘I believe’, and ‘it is obvious’, or ‘I think’ are all indications that you are getting more than just straight data. To practise, listen or watch the news today and see how much information you are given is straight fact in comparison to points of view – you may be surprised! Body language will also indicate their emotional involvement in their presentation, so watch and listen for these clues also.
Your own thinking process
As we have discussed before, your subconscious brain does a great job at filtering information in a way that it thinks it is going to be useful for you. Before you know it consciously, masses on information is deleted, distorted or generalised before you make a conscious note of it. However, as this is your brain, it is possible to ‘tee-up’ your subconscious and check that your filters are doing a good job! For example, you may well be presented with the monthly revenue figures on a regular basis and you will skim to the data that is of most interest to you. Your brain will be noting this and spot a trend – a path of least resistance to make it easier for you next time. However, this may mean you miss something very obvious! So – practise looking somewhere different each month to keep you attuned and able to notice anomalies more easily.
In summary, just like any mechanical part, our brain’s filtering system can always do with a service! There may not be a need to change anything, but taking it apart, giving it a shake up and oiling it so that it is fully operable can only help it be more effective and efficient. It also may also last longer too, which can only be a good thing!
Until next week
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
It’s child’s play!
Just how many times have we been embarrassed by our children, when they say something really inappropriate at the wrong time? It usually happens somewhere very public, like the Supermarket queue and you are caught unawares. For example, “Daddy – why is that woman wearing THAT red hat?” The entire supermarket queue then looks at you, the woman with the red hat and your child. Whilst you are desperately trying to think of a suitable answer, you can feel yourself going the colour to match the hat, and your tongue sticks to the roof of your mouth. Your ability to give a witty or sensible response has long since disappeared. The rest of the queue are of course giggling thinking “thank goodness that is not me!” Been there? Most of us have in some way, many times!
However, there is something fantastic about children’s ability to observe and comment on some wonderful things that we as adults, no longer see or experience, or no longer allow ourselves to do so. How much are we missing out, both in terms of fun, but more importantly, missing some critical information for running our businesses?
Let’s start with the fun bit! Please answer the following questions very honestly:
• When did you last giggle in the back of some meeting or forum?
• When did you allow yourself to dream about the most ridiculous things?
• When was the last time that you had a big public tantrum?
• Have you had an urge to give someone a sweet or hug just because you liked them?
• When did you let yourself abandon what you were doing, as you suddenly want to go and do something else, leaving the last thing strewn across the floor or desk?
So – how did you do on the ‘Child behaviour’ scale?
Umm – depressing isn’t it? Although this may seem a little trite, answering such questions made me realise just how serious and ‘correct’ a way of life we choose to live and work. Not for a moment am I suggesting that you have a tantrum in the next meeting, (unless you really want to!) but I am suggesting that it may be worth reviewing how much we take fun out of what we do – and that may not be necessary all the time. There is plenty of research that tell us that enjoying our work and having fun makes us much more effective – we have just forgotten how! We all work such long hours these days, why not enjoy your morning’s commute tomorrow thinking up ways to make your day more fun. What would you do if you were still 10? – that may help!
The other ‘child’ factor to think about is filtering. As we age, our brains very cleverly learn to filter information that no longer seems be necessary to acknowledge in our conscious brain. For example, it would be hard work to still have to think consciously about how to tie our shoelaces, get dressed, drive, spell etc., all of which we just do without thinking (well – unless it was a very late night?!). This frees up room in our head to do much more complicated thinking – such as run our business, answer emails, texts and play with our blackberry simultaneously. But have we filtered out too much in some circumstances? Are there some things that we no longer see or acknowledge?
I have a dear friend, who is a correspondent for a world wide media company. One of the things that I treasure about him, and probably makes him excel in his profession, is his ability to look at the world in an almost naive manner. His ability to ask questions which sound almost child-like, enable him to get to the bottom of many issues much more quickly than others. He has not hesitation in asking ‘So – why are you doing that?’ – when it would seem obvious why. Let me give you a small example. He was in my house, when I was answering some emails from clients a couple of weeks back. He came over and said that exact question “Why are you doing that?” – to which I must have looked slightly irritated and said “Well – they sent me an email and so I am responding and want to get back to them immediately”. He then said “But I thought your business was about building rapport – so why are you answering them on email?” He meant it completely innocently, and smiled and walked away. I then sat and thought for a moment – I had made a whole mass of assumptions that they would want me to reply on email, although it is so true that a phone call would be much better choice of medium. I duly picked up the phone and had a much more fruitful and rewarding conversation with my client, which we both acknowledged.
How much of our daily behaviour is driven subconsciously, and enable us to miss out on some really obvious opportunities?
So – Can I recommend you take five minutes out of your day, and think:
• How many of my repeated actions I could do differently?
• When was the last time I stopped and asked myself ‘Why do I do things this way?’
• What assumptions am I making about my meetings today?
• How do I know that they are real assumptions?
• What ‘rules’ do we have in the organisation, that are there for history sake rather than logic?
• Who is the newest member of the team? Have I asked them for their observations of how we do business?
• If I had a ten year old in my office, what would they notice?
So enjoy looking for the obvious, pretending to be young and naïve again – you may get some surprising results!
Until next week!
Kate Tojeiro is and Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
However, there is something fantastic about children’s ability to observe and comment on some wonderful things that we as adults, no longer see or experience, or no longer allow ourselves to do so. How much are we missing out, both in terms of fun, but more importantly, missing some critical information for running our businesses?
Let’s start with the fun bit! Please answer the following questions very honestly:
• When did you last giggle in the back of some meeting or forum?
• When did you allow yourself to dream about the most ridiculous things?
• When was the last time that you had a big public tantrum?
• Have you had an urge to give someone a sweet or hug just because you liked them?
• When did you let yourself abandon what you were doing, as you suddenly want to go and do something else, leaving the last thing strewn across the floor or desk?
So – how did you do on the ‘Child behaviour’ scale?
Umm – depressing isn’t it? Although this may seem a little trite, answering such questions made me realise just how serious and ‘correct’ a way of life we choose to live and work. Not for a moment am I suggesting that you have a tantrum in the next meeting, (unless you really want to!) but I am suggesting that it may be worth reviewing how much we take fun out of what we do – and that may not be necessary all the time. There is plenty of research that tell us that enjoying our work and having fun makes us much more effective – we have just forgotten how! We all work such long hours these days, why not enjoy your morning’s commute tomorrow thinking up ways to make your day more fun. What would you do if you were still 10? – that may help!
The other ‘child’ factor to think about is filtering. As we age, our brains very cleverly learn to filter information that no longer seems be necessary to acknowledge in our conscious brain. For example, it would be hard work to still have to think consciously about how to tie our shoelaces, get dressed, drive, spell etc., all of which we just do without thinking (well – unless it was a very late night?!). This frees up room in our head to do much more complicated thinking – such as run our business, answer emails, texts and play with our blackberry simultaneously. But have we filtered out too much in some circumstances? Are there some things that we no longer see or acknowledge?
I have a dear friend, who is a correspondent for a world wide media company. One of the things that I treasure about him, and probably makes him excel in his profession, is his ability to look at the world in an almost naive manner. His ability to ask questions which sound almost child-like, enable him to get to the bottom of many issues much more quickly than others. He has not hesitation in asking ‘So – why are you doing that?’ – when it would seem obvious why. Let me give you a small example. He was in my house, when I was answering some emails from clients a couple of weeks back. He came over and said that exact question “Why are you doing that?” – to which I must have looked slightly irritated and said “Well – they sent me an email and so I am responding and want to get back to them immediately”. He then said “But I thought your business was about building rapport – so why are you answering them on email?” He meant it completely innocently, and smiled and walked away. I then sat and thought for a moment – I had made a whole mass of assumptions that they would want me to reply on email, although it is so true that a phone call would be much better choice of medium. I duly picked up the phone and had a much more fruitful and rewarding conversation with my client, which we both acknowledged.
How much of our daily behaviour is driven subconsciously, and enable us to miss out on some really obvious opportunities?
So – Can I recommend you take five minutes out of your day, and think:
• How many of my repeated actions I could do differently?
• When was the last time I stopped and asked myself ‘Why do I do things this way?’
• What assumptions am I making about my meetings today?
• How do I know that they are real assumptions?
• What ‘rules’ do we have in the organisation, that are there for history sake rather than logic?
• Who is the newest member of the team? Have I asked them for their observations of how we do business?
• If I had a ten year old in my office, what would they notice?
So enjoy looking for the obvious, pretending to be young and naïve again – you may get some surprising results!
Until next week!
Kate Tojeiro is and Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Letting go -
Some-one said to me recently; it’s not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce! Like that..
Last week for one reason or another was all about ‘letting go’, whether it’s letting a company go, a responsibility or accountability, a job, perhaps even a friend - it’s not easy!
One of my clients is the MD/ CEO of a successful packaging company and is contemplating selling it, last week he received a £150million valuation for his family-owned business. Instead of being overjoyed, my client, in his late forties, has been “really struggling and hesitating to just make the decision’’ While his father and various family members who co-own the business are fully onboard the with idea of selling, this man, whose children are still young, told me “I don’t want my children to grow up seeing me not going to work.”
“What a nice problem to have, I pondered, however this really gets at the heart of some difficult, serious issues.” A would-be seller inevitably bumps into big, hairy questions like, “Who am I without my business? Am I too young? What do I want to do with my life?’’. I have observed recently owners and shareholders wrestle with succession planning and have come to an almost heretical conclusion: I wonder if with business transitions, the social and emotional issues are the whole story and the finances almost a footnote?
The early bird…
Like a jolly good book, selling one’s business is often rife with tension and drama. The process can pit the interests of the business directly against the person who gave it life and breath, as it were. This is because human beings and companies rarely mature at the same speed. After the startup phase, eventually either the opportunities for the business mature, or the ownership matures and this certainly creates an interesting conflict.
The process is even trickier when a management team that has not yet reached maturity sees all sorts of opportunities to exploit and comes up against an owner who’s ready to retire. The activities that go with planning an exit—liquifying holdings, taking out capital, selling—are completely opposed to reinvesting capital to build on growth opportunities.
So how does a focused, pragmatic business owner navigate this charged minefield?
Start early, the thought process can take years and therefore I believe that it’s almost never too soon to begin thinking about possible exit strategies. Now, whilst this decision is largely personal, outside forces also come into play. From a financial perspective, the best time to sell is when business momentum is moving up. However, considering the right time is affected by the availability of capital, industry consolidation, and the overall health of the economy—all of which will have a bearing on your company’s valuation.
As I have observed first hand this last week, there would appear to be nearly as many methods for valuation as there are companies themselves. Though every deal is different, one thing is certain, the best way to arrive at an informed valuation is to prepare and get as many reference points as you can. Comparable business valuations can offer a very good starting point, as well as external advice from lawyers, accountants, bankers, brokers, friends and associates who have been through the experience before. Ensuring that you have the best financial reporting that you could possibly have in place is essential. People have got to know what they’re buying, which leads to some other questions; What creates value in your business? You may think your business is valuable, but is it valuable to anyone else? Is there management depth sufficient to run this company?
Value of course, can also be in the eye of the beholder, so the kind of exit strategy you choose will also influence a business’s worth. Privately-held companies in general have at least four choices: sell to a competitor or a financial buyer; sell to management; sell to the owner’s family; or recapitalization. Each of these options comes with its own special set of issues/ challenges! Would-be sellers to their children, for example, should remember that business acumen is not necessarily genetic, and that if you’re counting on your children to pay for your retirement, you may be in for a few ‘hairy’ Christmas dinners – or not! Have an honest, open discussion with them and find out if they’re equipped and even interested in taking over the business?
If you’re selling to management, one of my associates recalled the following tale which seemed to work well. This particular owner “test drove” his management team by taking an entire summer off to go sailing in the Med! When the team performed well, he set up a structure where they gradually bought him out over time. As it is oft said - management teams are like tea-bags - you never know how strong they are until you put them in hot water.
In all of these situations you will have to delegate and share some of the decision-making with your colleagues, so;
X Identify the resistance. Developing an awareness of why you are resistant to delegate is key. Are you just not used to delegating? Are you afraid of giving up control? Are you afraid that no one can carry out the task as well as you? Are you afraid that if you delegate the work, then you will not get the recognition and your job security might be threatened? Write down your fears.
X Notice the impact. Once you have identified the cause of your resistance, consider the impact that not delegating authority is having on you and others. This might include an increase in your workload and stress level, a decrease in your job satisfaction, and a negative impact on your relationships, both at work and personally.
X Consider the benefits of delegating authority. It could mean more freedom and time for yourself, less stress, improved work and personal relationships and the ability to focus on big-picture and higher priority issues.
X Make a commitment. Tell your boss and your colleagues (or your coach) that you are committing yourself to start delegating more tasks and authority. Write it down and post it somewhere. Ask trusted colleagues to remind you if you start to wander off from your commitment (this also means not biting their heads off – if they do!).
X Begin the process. Start with delegating tasks that will not give you heart palpitations, then work your way up to larger tasks as you become more comfortable with the process. Keep an open mind. Once you have mastered or feel more comfortable with delegating tasks on an individual basis, consider doing this for projects. Ask your colleagues what more they can do. You will be surprised what they will be willing to take on for you.
X Follow-up and celebrate the successes. When delegating make sure that you set a time to follow up with colleagues to see how they are progressing with a given task. Remember to encourage, acknowledge and champion them. Let them know that you have full confidence that they can do it. Praise them when they complete the task. Even more important is to see what the impact of delegating has on you. Write down all the positive aspects of delegating you have noticed. Ask your colleagues about how they have found the process and how they think you are doing.
Remember: the more you delegate the easier it becomes. It is like developing a new habit – in fact it is!
Letting go can be a great and liberating experience, I know that from ‘letting go’ my first company. Whether you are letting go of a business or a friend –or in my case last week a big hairy horse, there is always a time for departure even when there is no certain place to go… so, all the best!
Until next week…
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Last week for one reason or another was all about ‘letting go’, whether it’s letting a company go, a responsibility or accountability, a job, perhaps even a friend - it’s not easy!
One of my clients is the MD/ CEO of a successful packaging company and is contemplating selling it, last week he received a £150million valuation for his family-owned business. Instead of being overjoyed, my client, in his late forties, has been “really struggling and hesitating to just make the decision’’ While his father and various family members who co-own the business are fully onboard the with idea of selling, this man, whose children are still young, told me “I don’t want my children to grow up seeing me not going to work.”
“What a nice problem to have, I pondered, however this really gets at the heart of some difficult, serious issues.” A would-be seller inevitably bumps into big, hairy questions like, “Who am I without my business? Am I too young? What do I want to do with my life?’’. I have observed recently owners and shareholders wrestle with succession planning and have come to an almost heretical conclusion: I wonder if with business transitions, the social and emotional issues are the whole story and the finances almost a footnote?
The early bird…
Like a jolly good book, selling one’s business is often rife with tension and drama. The process can pit the interests of the business directly against the person who gave it life and breath, as it were. This is because human beings and companies rarely mature at the same speed. After the startup phase, eventually either the opportunities for the business mature, or the ownership matures and this certainly creates an interesting conflict.
The process is even trickier when a management team that has not yet reached maturity sees all sorts of opportunities to exploit and comes up against an owner who’s ready to retire. The activities that go with planning an exit—liquifying holdings, taking out capital, selling—are completely opposed to reinvesting capital to build on growth opportunities.
So how does a focused, pragmatic business owner navigate this charged minefield?
Start early, the thought process can take years and therefore I believe that it’s almost never too soon to begin thinking about possible exit strategies. Now, whilst this decision is largely personal, outside forces also come into play. From a financial perspective, the best time to sell is when business momentum is moving up. However, considering the right time is affected by the availability of capital, industry consolidation, and the overall health of the economy—all of which will have a bearing on your company’s valuation.
As I have observed first hand this last week, there would appear to be nearly as many methods for valuation as there are companies themselves. Though every deal is different, one thing is certain, the best way to arrive at an informed valuation is to prepare and get as many reference points as you can. Comparable business valuations can offer a very good starting point, as well as external advice from lawyers, accountants, bankers, brokers, friends and associates who have been through the experience before. Ensuring that you have the best financial reporting that you could possibly have in place is essential. People have got to know what they’re buying, which leads to some other questions; What creates value in your business? You may think your business is valuable, but is it valuable to anyone else? Is there management depth sufficient to run this company?
Value of course, can also be in the eye of the beholder, so the kind of exit strategy you choose will also influence a business’s worth. Privately-held companies in general have at least four choices: sell to a competitor or a financial buyer; sell to management; sell to the owner’s family; or recapitalization. Each of these options comes with its own special set of issues/ challenges! Would-be sellers to their children, for example, should remember that business acumen is not necessarily genetic, and that if you’re counting on your children to pay for your retirement, you may be in for a few ‘hairy’ Christmas dinners – or not! Have an honest, open discussion with them and find out if they’re equipped and even interested in taking over the business?
If you’re selling to management, one of my associates recalled the following tale which seemed to work well. This particular owner “test drove” his management team by taking an entire summer off to go sailing in the Med! When the team performed well, he set up a structure where they gradually bought him out over time. As it is oft said - management teams are like tea-bags - you never know how strong they are until you put them in hot water.
In all of these situations you will have to delegate and share some of the decision-making with your colleagues, so;
X Identify the resistance. Developing an awareness of why you are resistant to delegate is key. Are you just not used to delegating? Are you afraid of giving up control? Are you afraid that no one can carry out the task as well as you? Are you afraid that if you delegate the work, then you will not get the recognition and your job security might be threatened? Write down your fears.
X Notice the impact. Once you have identified the cause of your resistance, consider the impact that not delegating authority is having on you and others. This might include an increase in your workload and stress level, a decrease in your job satisfaction, and a negative impact on your relationships, both at work and personally.
X Consider the benefits of delegating authority. It could mean more freedom and time for yourself, less stress, improved work and personal relationships and the ability to focus on big-picture and higher priority issues.
X Make a commitment. Tell your boss and your colleagues (or your coach) that you are committing yourself to start delegating more tasks and authority. Write it down and post it somewhere. Ask trusted colleagues to remind you if you start to wander off from your commitment (this also means not biting their heads off – if they do!).
X Begin the process. Start with delegating tasks that will not give you heart palpitations, then work your way up to larger tasks as you become more comfortable with the process. Keep an open mind. Once you have mastered or feel more comfortable with delegating tasks on an individual basis, consider doing this for projects. Ask your colleagues what more they can do. You will be surprised what they will be willing to take on for you.
X Follow-up and celebrate the successes. When delegating make sure that you set a time to follow up with colleagues to see how they are progressing with a given task. Remember to encourage, acknowledge and champion them. Let them know that you have full confidence that they can do it. Praise them when they complete the task. Even more important is to see what the impact of delegating has on you. Write down all the positive aspects of delegating you have noticed. Ask your colleagues about how they have found the process and how they think you are doing.
Remember: the more you delegate the easier it becomes. It is like developing a new habit – in fact it is!
Letting go can be a great and liberating experience, I know that from ‘letting go’ my first company. Whether you are letting go of a business or a friend –or in my case last week a big hairy horse, there is always a time for departure even when there is no certain place to go… so, all the best!
Until next week…
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
‘Is there a Gorilla on your table?’
That might sound a strange way to start an article on improving your performance, I admit! However, I have lost count as to how many Gorillas I have encountered on board tables. Let me explain, if I may.
As successful organisations, you have essentially got into a way that works for you. You and the other members of the executive have written and unwritten rules of working together – some probably work better than others. However, during the months of setting these up, there were one or two really, really difficult areas that none of you knew how to resolve. Or worse – between you, you may have decided that in fact they were too hard to resolve, so you learn to work around them. After a while, you have all become so expert at working around the issue that you no longer notice that it is there! For someone new coming into your environment, they may appear huge, as big as a Gorilla, and are amazed at how you just no longer notice it – but this really does happen in most companies somewhere. Now it is commendable to say the least, to be able to work around such a large ‘issue’, but my question to you is ‘How much more would you all be able to achieve if the Gorilla was removed?’
As an extreme example, I have spent some time living and working in Central America, where many Companies have ‘Gorillas’, which are usually in the shape of a distant family member of the owner (not literally you understand!). They are often totally inappropriately positioned in the company, but it is deemed too politically sensitive to even mention this to the owner, so the Board learn to work with (or more often, around) the individual. However, it is not effective for either the individual nor the company in the long run. This type of issue is seemed to be too difficult to resolve, but can be with diplomacy, thought and discretion, for the good of all in the longer term.
So – ask yourself the questions
• If I brought in an ‘Outsider’ into our board meetings, such as a new member of the team, or a Graduate on work experience, what Gorilla would they spot?
• Is the ‘Gorilla’ a person, a rule, or a process perhaps?
• If it was not there, what would we be able to achieve?
• How does this weigh up with the process of removing it?
For many of us, the short term hassle of resolving it may put us off. However, just listen to your subconscious thinking when asking the questions. It will soon let you know if you are putting off the inevitable and actually reducing your chances of succeeding in the long run.
Don’t forget that the Gorilla may also be very obvious to the rest of the organisation, and are confused as to why it has not been removed. They many not understand the nuances of the political balance of keeping the person, or the process in place – but does that matter? They may have a point, and just think of what positive impact you will have on their morale too, if the Gorilla issue is resolved.
For many years, I worked in a large retail organisation, which had its headquarters in a typical 70’s style office block. The time came to give it a ‘revamp’ and I was on the project for designing and implementing. When asking the office staff for their ideas for change, by far the greatest feedback was for more informal break-out and meeting space. Now, there was a huge atrium in this building, which has remained empty since we moved in. We all walked through it everyday and had got completely used to the cathedral style entrance. It suddenly dawned on us that the Atrium would be a fantastic place for informal meetings etc., by putting in a variety of sofas, chairs and tables etc. However, on asking the Safety Officer his views, he immediate answer was; “Can’t do that – we asked the Fire Department years ago and they said it was a fire risk”. So years, literally, had gone by with this empty space that we had got used to. I cheekily asked “Have we asked them recently?” .. well no we hadn’t – not for fifteen years! Sure enough, the Fire department were duly invited up and asked the question “How could we make this space usable?”. Within 2 hours, we had some fantastic ideas, combined with extra fire doors etc., that could completely transform the atrium, with no increase in safety risk. Once implemented, the transformation of the entire atmosphere of the building was phenomenal – and all because we challenged one Gorilla.
So why not go ‘Office Gorilla Hunting’ today and see what transformations you can make!
Until next week!
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
As successful organisations, you have essentially got into a way that works for you. You and the other members of the executive have written and unwritten rules of working together – some probably work better than others. However, during the months of setting these up, there were one or two really, really difficult areas that none of you knew how to resolve. Or worse – between you, you may have decided that in fact they were too hard to resolve, so you learn to work around them. After a while, you have all become so expert at working around the issue that you no longer notice that it is there! For someone new coming into your environment, they may appear huge, as big as a Gorilla, and are amazed at how you just no longer notice it – but this really does happen in most companies somewhere. Now it is commendable to say the least, to be able to work around such a large ‘issue’, but my question to you is ‘How much more would you all be able to achieve if the Gorilla was removed?’
As an extreme example, I have spent some time living and working in Central America, where many Companies have ‘Gorillas’, which are usually in the shape of a distant family member of the owner (not literally you understand!). They are often totally inappropriately positioned in the company, but it is deemed too politically sensitive to even mention this to the owner, so the Board learn to work with (or more often, around) the individual. However, it is not effective for either the individual nor the company in the long run. This type of issue is seemed to be too difficult to resolve, but can be with diplomacy, thought and discretion, for the good of all in the longer term.
So – ask yourself the questions
• If I brought in an ‘Outsider’ into our board meetings, such as a new member of the team, or a Graduate on work experience, what Gorilla would they spot?
• Is the ‘Gorilla’ a person, a rule, or a process perhaps?
• If it was not there, what would we be able to achieve?
• How does this weigh up with the process of removing it?
For many of us, the short term hassle of resolving it may put us off. However, just listen to your subconscious thinking when asking the questions. It will soon let you know if you are putting off the inevitable and actually reducing your chances of succeeding in the long run.
Don’t forget that the Gorilla may also be very obvious to the rest of the organisation, and are confused as to why it has not been removed. They many not understand the nuances of the political balance of keeping the person, or the process in place – but does that matter? They may have a point, and just think of what positive impact you will have on their morale too, if the Gorilla issue is resolved.
For many years, I worked in a large retail organisation, which had its headquarters in a typical 70’s style office block. The time came to give it a ‘revamp’ and I was on the project for designing and implementing. When asking the office staff for their ideas for change, by far the greatest feedback was for more informal break-out and meeting space. Now, there was a huge atrium in this building, which has remained empty since we moved in. We all walked through it everyday and had got completely used to the cathedral style entrance. It suddenly dawned on us that the Atrium would be a fantastic place for informal meetings etc., by putting in a variety of sofas, chairs and tables etc. However, on asking the Safety Officer his views, he immediate answer was; “Can’t do that – we asked the Fire Department years ago and they said it was a fire risk”. So years, literally, had gone by with this empty space that we had got used to. I cheekily asked “Have we asked them recently?” .. well no we hadn’t – not for fifteen years! Sure enough, the Fire department were duly invited up and asked the question “How could we make this space usable?”. Within 2 hours, we had some fantastic ideas, combined with extra fire doors etc., that could completely transform the atrium, with no increase in safety risk. Once implemented, the transformation of the entire atmosphere of the building was phenomenal – and all because we challenged one Gorilla.
So why not go ‘Office Gorilla Hunting’ today and see what transformations you can make!
Until next week!
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
HAVE YOU EXERCISED YOUR INTUITION?
The World Bank President did not have a good week last week. He was quoted as saying “In hindsight, I wish I had trusted my original instincts.” Now – just how many times have we said the same to ourselves?
Our instinct, gut feel, intuition; (call it what you will), is a phenomenal gift given to us all when born, but as we grow up, we increasingly question its use, particularly in business. Partly through education and our obsession with measuring everything, intuition is often not referred to as a useful business tool, but a risk. However, when you read books and articles on, or written by successful Entrepreneurs and business tycoons, there is a continual reference to their use of intuition as part of their success.
Let me give you an example. Can you remember the last time that you bought a house? I have recently been working with a colleague who has just done that and the conversation went along the lines of “ Well – we spent ages writing down our top 10 ‘Must-haves’ for the house. You know, 4 bedrooms, adequate garage space etc.. We shared this with the Estate Agent and asked her to ensure that these were taken into consideration with every house we see.” Weekend before last, I bumped into her and she was so elated. “We have found the most fabulous house – it just feels so right for us – we decided that we could probably live there for ever”. After hearing about the style, I did ask if it ticked all 10 ‘Must-Haves’. “Oh no – about 4 actually, but we will manage, as we just love it!” Now, they may well have bought a house with all 10 buttons ticked, but would have ‘felt’ right, and therefore would they have been happy and satisfied in it? The same can be said about decisions at work, of course.
Just think back through last week, in particular decisions made and meetings attended:
X How many decisions did you make that just ‘felt right’ and took little deep thought?
X Are there any decisions that you made logically, but keep coming back into your mind?
X How often do you allow yourself to use ‘change your mind’ based on a feeling?
It is a difficult one as intuition is, by its nature, difficult to measure and also difficult to explain and articulate to others. If you are spending a significant amount of money on behalf of other Partners, by just saying “it just feels right” is probably not going to tick their box!
However, allowing ourselves to at least be aware of our gut feel may make all the difference to our decisions. Neurologically, we still have much to learn, but we are beginning to understand why intuition is more than just a whim or risk. Intuition is something that comes from within, from our subconscious mind. What our subconscious mind does is spot congruences and ‘mis-matches’ in communication and thinking that our conscious mind does not. For example, a Supplier may be saying something about their product to you, but your subconscious is busy matching what is being said to the non-verbal communication. If there is a mis-match, (for example, eye direction and movement, gestures, posture etc) it will pick it up and you will get that ‘gut-feel’ even though you don’t know why. Alternatively, in buying the house, my colleague will have had tremendous congruence between their emotional feelings about living in a dream house and the house that they were experiencing, which is why it ‘just felt right’.
So, as a Leader in your organisation, how much lee way do you give to allowing ‘gut-feel’ to play a part in your decisions, and events? There is clearly a balance so that your decisions are based on sound judgement and reason. However, checking the extra ‘gut-feel ’button just may make the difference between a right decision and a phenomenal one!
As a start, you can easily practise becoming more aware of the link between your thoughts and your own body (which creates that gut feel) by trying these simple exercises:
X Watching your football/rugby/sports team at the weekend. Think about the physical effects on your body every time there is a score. What hurts, what feels good?
X Getting up on Monday morning – how do you feel in your head, and how is the body in comparison?
X Holding a meeting with colleagues you respect – how is your posture, your gestures, your energy levels?
All of these will give you great insight to how your body responds to events and decisions going on in your business. Enjoy using it to your advantage!
Until next week
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Our instinct, gut feel, intuition; (call it what you will), is a phenomenal gift given to us all when born, but as we grow up, we increasingly question its use, particularly in business. Partly through education and our obsession with measuring everything, intuition is often not referred to as a useful business tool, but a risk. However, when you read books and articles on, or written by successful Entrepreneurs and business tycoons, there is a continual reference to their use of intuition as part of their success.
Let me give you an example. Can you remember the last time that you bought a house? I have recently been working with a colleague who has just done that and the conversation went along the lines of “ Well – we spent ages writing down our top 10 ‘Must-haves’ for the house. You know, 4 bedrooms, adequate garage space etc.. We shared this with the Estate Agent and asked her to ensure that these were taken into consideration with every house we see.” Weekend before last, I bumped into her and she was so elated. “We have found the most fabulous house – it just feels so right for us – we decided that we could probably live there for ever”. After hearing about the style, I did ask if it ticked all 10 ‘Must-Haves’. “Oh no – about 4 actually, but we will manage, as we just love it!” Now, they may well have bought a house with all 10 buttons ticked, but would have ‘felt’ right, and therefore would they have been happy and satisfied in it? The same can be said about decisions at work, of course.
Just think back through last week, in particular decisions made and meetings attended:
X How many decisions did you make that just ‘felt right’ and took little deep thought?
X Are there any decisions that you made logically, but keep coming back into your mind?
X How often do you allow yourself to use ‘change your mind’ based on a feeling?
It is a difficult one as intuition is, by its nature, difficult to measure and also difficult to explain and articulate to others. If you are spending a significant amount of money on behalf of other Partners, by just saying “it just feels right” is probably not going to tick their box!
However, allowing ourselves to at least be aware of our gut feel may make all the difference to our decisions. Neurologically, we still have much to learn, but we are beginning to understand why intuition is more than just a whim or risk. Intuition is something that comes from within, from our subconscious mind. What our subconscious mind does is spot congruences and ‘mis-matches’ in communication and thinking that our conscious mind does not. For example, a Supplier may be saying something about their product to you, but your subconscious is busy matching what is being said to the non-verbal communication. If there is a mis-match, (for example, eye direction and movement, gestures, posture etc) it will pick it up and you will get that ‘gut-feel’ even though you don’t know why. Alternatively, in buying the house, my colleague will have had tremendous congruence between their emotional feelings about living in a dream house and the house that they were experiencing, which is why it ‘just felt right’.
So, as a Leader in your organisation, how much lee way do you give to allowing ‘gut-feel’ to play a part in your decisions, and events? There is clearly a balance so that your decisions are based on sound judgement and reason. However, checking the extra ‘gut-feel ’button just may make the difference between a right decision and a phenomenal one!
As a start, you can easily practise becoming more aware of the link between your thoughts and your own body (which creates that gut feel) by trying these simple exercises:
X Watching your football/rugby/sports team at the weekend. Think about the physical effects on your body every time there is a score. What hurts, what feels good?
X Getting up on Monday morning – how do you feel in your head, and how is the body in comparison?
X Holding a meeting with colleagues you respect – how is your posture, your gestures, your energy levels?
All of these will give you great insight to how your body responds to events and decisions going on in your business. Enjoy using it to your advantage!
Until next week
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
The path of least resistance!
This week having worked at one end of the spectrum with one of the greatest technology companies of our current time and at the other a niche, creative and curious SME - a question emerged. How often do we as individuals or organizations choose the path of least resistance at risk of limiting our ambitions, options and dreams?
As the CEO of any business, one of the most important aspects of being a leader is being a person that others want to follow. Every action you take daily, weekly, monthly during your career will determine whether people will one day want to follow you. Successful leaders are honest about the potential risks inherent in the chosen path. They communicate, not just the overall direction, but any information followers need to successfully and skillfully carry out their responsibilities.
Sometimes the tackling of a new direction, launch of next generation product, expansion to another continent or maybe confronting the fact that something just isn’t working and needs to be addressed can be difficult. All of these things will have a number of challenges and tactical strategies to address.
Whatever it is that you as an individual or an organization are pursuing, it really has to be compelling enough for you to keep up all the energies and resources to drive through the change.
I worked with client (also a CEO) recently who after a significant personal crisis in his life, had decided that a holiday / a few weeks off would be a good plan.
Now, the Caribbean, white beaches, a pleasant hotel, beautiful countryside, some sunshine, briefly came to mind and I then (knowing who I was dealing with?!) ventured the question ‘where’?
Despite the huge desire to do the ‘usual’ thing; Spain to play a bit of golf, Nevis even - nice golf course there - great sailing too - he said that these things were not inspiring him and what he really wanted to do was something really different to be true to himself.
After lots of debate, discussion and perhaps uncomfortable questioning, this CEO is going to Somalia!
Just about all of his mates and family said ‘Why can't you just find somewhere you can sit by the water with a drink with a paper umbrella in it?" Let’s face it - if you're looking for easy, Somalia probably isn’t the first destination on your list.
In spite of that occasional voice of dissent, he is delighted about this trip. Really excited and energized. The challenges are a part of the landscape – he knows that he’s going to encounter them in some fashion - but they're not defining the whole thing – which is the most important point. He is confident that, even if he doesn’t feel comfortable in a given circumstance, he can work his way through most of the problems that may arise. The key thing here is that if he wasn’t willing to risk those challenges, he would be cheating himself out of some amazing experiences.
No prizes for the parallel coming here!
Going to Somalia, establishing your company overseas, making that leap to global player - require jumping in and immersing yourself in something that will energize you ( and possibly terrify you at certain junctures) if you truly believe in it. Along the way, bumps in the road will be encountered (both literally and figuratively). Finding a path that lights you up in your career or personal life is energizing, but I can almost guarantee that it won't be trouble-free. There will be bumps in the road.
So the question is;
• What do you do with that knowledge?
• How does knowing that you're going to encounter obstacles shape your future?
• Can you be true to yourself and your company? live the values; growth, innovation, integrity - whatever they may be,
• Do you spend all your energy avoiding the bumps?
• Or do you commit to a fully enriched life with the knowledge that - even if it's occasionally uncomfortable along the way - you can ultimately sort out whatever challenges you encounter?
The world of opportunity is mind-bogglingly vast. But if you insist on getting to your destination by the path of least resistance, your options are limited.
Ps. since writing this piece - I have news from Somalia and all is well, it’s great in fact!
Until next week..
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
As the CEO of any business, one of the most important aspects of being a leader is being a person that others want to follow. Every action you take daily, weekly, monthly during your career will determine whether people will one day want to follow you. Successful leaders are honest about the potential risks inherent in the chosen path. They communicate, not just the overall direction, but any information followers need to successfully and skillfully carry out their responsibilities.
Sometimes the tackling of a new direction, launch of next generation product, expansion to another continent or maybe confronting the fact that something just isn’t working and needs to be addressed can be difficult. All of these things will have a number of challenges and tactical strategies to address.
Whatever it is that you as an individual or an organization are pursuing, it really has to be compelling enough for you to keep up all the energies and resources to drive through the change.
I worked with client (also a CEO) recently who after a significant personal crisis in his life, had decided that a holiday / a few weeks off would be a good plan.
Now, the Caribbean, white beaches, a pleasant hotel, beautiful countryside, some sunshine, briefly came to mind and I then (knowing who I was dealing with?!) ventured the question ‘where’?
Despite the huge desire to do the ‘usual’ thing; Spain to play a bit of golf, Nevis even - nice golf course there - great sailing too - he said that these things were not inspiring him and what he really wanted to do was something really different to be true to himself.
After lots of debate, discussion and perhaps uncomfortable questioning, this CEO is going to Somalia!
Just about all of his mates and family said ‘Why can't you just find somewhere you can sit by the water with a drink with a paper umbrella in it?" Let’s face it - if you're looking for easy, Somalia probably isn’t the first destination on your list.
In spite of that occasional voice of dissent, he is delighted about this trip. Really excited and energized. The challenges are a part of the landscape – he knows that he’s going to encounter them in some fashion - but they're not defining the whole thing – which is the most important point. He is confident that, even if he doesn’t feel comfortable in a given circumstance, he can work his way through most of the problems that may arise. The key thing here is that if he wasn’t willing to risk those challenges, he would be cheating himself out of some amazing experiences.
No prizes for the parallel coming here!
Going to Somalia, establishing your company overseas, making that leap to global player - require jumping in and immersing yourself in something that will energize you ( and possibly terrify you at certain junctures) if you truly believe in it. Along the way, bumps in the road will be encountered (both literally and figuratively). Finding a path that lights you up in your career or personal life is energizing, but I can almost guarantee that it won't be trouble-free. There will be bumps in the road.
So the question is;
• What do you do with that knowledge?
• How does knowing that you're going to encounter obstacles shape your future?
• Can you be true to yourself and your company? live the values; growth, innovation, integrity - whatever they may be,
• Do you spend all your energy avoiding the bumps?
• Or do you commit to a fully enriched life with the knowledge that - even if it's occasionally uncomfortable along the way - you can ultimately sort out whatever challenges you encounter?
The world of opportunity is mind-bogglingly vast. But if you insist on getting to your destination by the path of least resistance, your options are limited.
Ps. since writing this piece - I have news from Somalia and all is well, it’s great in fact!
Until next week..
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
‘Live in the present!’
How often have you been sitting in a meeting and not really being there? How often have you been playing with the kids and not really giving them your attention? How often have you been ‘listening’ to your partner but missing most of the conversation? It is not good to be on the receiving end of this ‘missing person’ is it? However, our busy minds tend to encourage us to often attend an event, without taking our full brain with us.
Much research has been undertaken in recent years, particularly by eminent people such as Daniel Goleman, which has helped us to understand the ‘busy mind’ phenomenon and the impact that it has on us, others and the organisation. Bottom line? – it is not good! However, the good news is that we can train the busy minds to be calm and to work more effectively!
In a nutshell, an overactive, busy mind creates much internal noise and clutter. This then interferes with our thought processing, our hearing, creativity and our intuition. The result is not being able to make decisions effectively and rationally, which can result in poor performance. Now you probably knew that already if you thought about it. The research has now provided us with the evidence that ‘Busy Mind syndrome’ really is critical in preventing our greatest performance.
So – how do you create a calm and effective mind that will let you live ‘in the present’? Here are some tried and trusted suggestions.
Find a place to put your busy thoughts
Now knowing that a busy mind is not always effective, you owe it to yourself to find times to create a calm and quiet brain. Being a successful leader will inevitably mean that you have a million things going on at one time – or at least it may feel like that. We are not suggesting that you forget all these things when you step into a one-to-one with someone, for example. However, you could put these ‘things’ somewhere safe, for you to pick up after the meeting, and try to be completely present at that meeting.
One colleague I work with has a virtual filing cabinet in his mind, and imagines putting all his things in there, locking it for safety, before he attends a meeting. He then focuses completely on the meeting, knowing that he can open up the cabinet the moment the meeting finishes. His dedication to the meetings produces much greater results, and his team have complemented him on this new style, stating how much more valued they feel.
Sue Knight (an excellent writer on successful work practices), talks about one client who had a ‘worry tree’. Before he entered the house at night, he would hang up all his work worries in the big tree in his front garden, before seeing his family. He could then focus on just them and the enjoyment of home. What was interesting is that in the mornings, as he goes to pick up the worries on his way to work, they are often much less than the night before!
See if you can find someway to park your thoughts, concerns and worries before embarking in an important event with others.
Use your perspective
When you are in an anxious state of mind, why does everything else seems to get worse? You start looking for the awful things going on, and your sub-conscious mind fills your brain with messages such as “ Wow, I am too busy; I am too stressed” etc, creating more unnecessary noise in your head. Have you got a quick way to get your perspective back, and see that life really is quite good? Maybe this is a photo of your partner, or family or favourite pet, a wonderful piece of music, a ‘happy’ memory. Practice finding some quick way to reframe your thinking and perspective in life – which will inevitably calm your brain and enable you to think more effectively.
Assume innocence in others
Some idiot has just pushed in front of you and made you miss the lights, on your drive home – and you are now seething and can think of nothing else! When you get home, how many of us have blurted out the inadequacies of the rest of the drivers on the road and vented your anger on an innocent family who have been longing to see you? That thought process is stopping us take in anything pleasant around us, filling your mind with unhelpful emotions, let alone affecting our blood pressure and health! So – ask yourself “does it really matter? Maybe they did not see me, maybe they have a sick partner at home; there maybe many reasons that they did what they did”. You will never know what was reality; you are just ASSUMING that they are evil and pushy! It will make absolutely no difference to them what you think, so why not let it go, assume innocence and enjoy your evening instead. This one takes practise but worth it in the end!
Practise, practise, practise – all these tactics require practising many times before they become automatic. Have fun experimenting with ways to enable you to live ‘in the present’ at times, creating a calm brain. Enjoy the results!
Until next week,
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Much research has been undertaken in recent years, particularly by eminent people such as Daniel Goleman, which has helped us to understand the ‘busy mind’ phenomenon and the impact that it has on us, others and the organisation. Bottom line? – it is not good! However, the good news is that we can train the busy minds to be calm and to work more effectively!
In a nutshell, an overactive, busy mind creates much internal noise and clutter. This then interferes with our thought processing, our hearing, creativity and our intuition. The result is not being able to make decisions effectively and rationally, which can result in poor performance. Now you probably knew that already if you thought about it. The research has now provided us with the evidence that ‘Busy Mind syndrome’ really is critical in preventing our greatest performance.
So – how do you create a calm and effective mind that will let you live ‘in the present’? Here are some tried and trusted suggestions.
Find a place to put your busy thoughts
Now knowing that a busy mind is not always effective, you owe it to yourself to find times to create a calm and quiet brain. Being a successful leader will inevitably mean that you have a million things going on at one time – or at least it may feel like that. We are not suggesting that you forget all these things when you step into a one-to-one with someone, for example. However, you could put these ‘things’ somewhere safe, for you to pick up after the meeting, and try to be completely present at that meeting.
One colleague I work with has a virtual filing cabinet in his mind, and imagines putting all his things in there, locking it for safety, before he attends a meeting. He then focuses completely on the meeting, knowing that he can open up the cabinet the moment the meeting finishes. His dedication to the meetings produces much greater results, and his team have complemented him on this new style, stating how much more valued they feel.
Sue Knight (an excellent writer on successful work practices), talks about one client who had a ‘worry tree’. Before he entered the house at night, he would hang up all his work worries in the big tree in his front garden, before seeing his family. He could then focus on just them and the enjoyment of home. What was interesting is that in the mornings, as he goes to pick up the worries on his way to work, they are often much less than the night before!
See if you can find someway to park your thoughts, concerns and worries before embarking in an important event with others.
Use your perspective
When you are in an anxious state of mind, why does everything else seems to get worse? You start looking for the awful things going on, and your sub-conscious mind fills your brain with messages such as “ Wow, I am too busy; I am too stressed” etc, creating more unnecessary noise in your head. Have you got a quick way to get your perspective back, and see that life really is quite good? Maybe this is a photo of your partner, or family or favourite pet, a wonderful piece of music, a ‘happy’ memory. Practice finding some quick way to reframe your thinking and perspective in life – which will inevitably calm your brain and enable you to think more effectively.
Assume innocence in others
Some idiot has just pushed in front of you and made you miss the lights, on your drive home – and you are now seething and can think of nothing else! When you get home, how many of us have blurted out the inadequacies of the rest of the drivers on the road and vented your anger on an innocent family who have been longing to see you? That thought process is stopping us take in anything pleasant around us, filling your mind with unhelpful emotions, let alone affecting our blood pressure and health! So – ask yourself “does it really matter? Maybe they did not see me, maybe they have a sick partner at home; there maybe many reasons that they did what they did”. You will never know what was reality; you are just ASSUMING that they are evil and pushy! It will make absolutely no difference to them what you think, so why not let it go, assume innocence and enjoy your evening instead. This one takes practise but worth it in the end!
Practise, practise, practise – all these tactics require practising many times before they become automatic. Have fun experimenting with ways to enable you to live ‘in the present’ at times, creating a calm brain. Enjoy the results!
Until next week,
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
‘Develop your strengths – the results will follow!’
Recently, I was walking along a corridor in the British HQ of a relatively large and successful software manufacturer. As I walked past the glass bowl of their large meeting room, I could see an intense meeting was taking place between 15 of their most senior staff. Masses of PowerPoint slides, a mass of A2 sized paper stuck across all walls with bullet points, scribbles and arrows on, animated debates and huddles happening and curled up sandwiches on the table. ‘So – what is going on there?’ I asked the CEO, as we walked swiftly by. ‘Oh – that is the all day meeting to understand why we did not win the latest bid to a potentially important client.’ Clearly a lot of blood sweat and tears was emanating from such a meeting. ‘So what do you do when you win a bid?’ I asked. The CEO stopped and thought for a while, then looked sheepish and said ‘Uhm, good question. I guess we just go to the pub and celebrate!’
Very interesting I thought, and probably not that unusual in many organisations. The focus here was quite rightly, to understand why we did not do something, and to bring it up to scratch. However, how much effort do we put into building on our strengths, in comparison to correcting our mistakes? How often is this reflected in our society and not just work? Your business probably started up based on an idea, a strength, a niche that you did/made better than anyone else. But once established, we tend to focus on the weaknesses rather than the strengths on a day to day basis. What opportunities are we missing out as a consequence?
Have a quick check and ask yourself:
X How often have you complained about a meal that was not up to par, in comparison to calling the chef to say how brilliant a meal was?
X How much time have you spent with your children to get them up to an acceptable level on a subject, in comparison to making them shine at their best topic?
X How much time do you focus on below standard products, or people, and bring them up to an acceptable level? How does this compare to increasing your best people or products?
X How many meetings are about correcting things, as opposed to making something good even better?
X Your performance system in your organisation – is this based on exceeding at strengths, or bringing everyone up to an acceptable level?
X What is your biggest plus point of your company? – how much time do you spend on using this to be even more successful?
In our society, there is a deep seated behavioural trait to correct things, to make weaknesses acceptable, to spot people’s mistakes. It is important not to ignore clearly unacceptable behaviour etc., but my question is how much effort goes into this, in comparison to improving what is already a winning strength?
Indulge yourself for a moment and think about something that you are really good at and enjoy doing. It maybe anything from playing golf, to speaking to the team, to cooking or driving – whatever. Imagine that you are doing it right now…. How does it feel? Are you smiling, are the hairs on the back of your neck standing up, are your shoulders relaxed? – does it feel good? People are at the best when they like to do something, when they know they are doing it well, when they use their strengths to achieve greater things. So can you use this knowledge and maximise people’s opportunity to feel like this? – the results will follow!
So – some questions for you to consider and act upon;
X What are the business’s top three strengths?
X What can I do differently that will use the strengths of our company to win more business?
X What are my top strengths – how can I use these actively on a daily basis?
X In developing our people, what is the balance between encouragement of strengths, and correcting weaknesses?
Try this too: As you walk into to your office, or a café, restaurant or home, focus on just the strengths of that environment and not the irritations – what do you notice that perhaps you have not allowed yourself to do in the past? How can these be adapted for use elsewhere?
In people, what are the best things about the people around you, at home and at work? Do you make the most of these?
If you look at elite and successful people, from Lance Armstrong, to Mozart, to Richard Branson, their success has been on identifying a unique strength on honing it to an excellent level. That is not to say that they don’t focus on correcting some inefficiencies or bad habits – but their emphasis will have been on the positive – to become even greater. It takes courage.
So – be courageous and start with yourself. What is your greatest strength and how are you going to maximise its use today?
Until next week,
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at Xfusion; www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Very interesting I thought, and probably not that unusual in many organisations. The focus here was quite rightly, to understand why we did not do something, and to bring it up to scratch. However, how much effort do we put into building on our strengths, in comparison to correcting our mistakes? How often is this reflected in our society and not just work? Your business probably started up based on an idea, a strength, a niche that you did/made better than anyone else. But once established, we tend to focus on the weaknesses rather than the strengths on a day to day basis. What opportunities are we missing out as a consequence?
Have a quick check and ask yourself:
X How often have you complained about a meal that was not up to par, in comparison to calling the chef to say how brilliant a meal was?
X How much time have you spent with your children to get them up to an acceptable level on a subject, in comparison to making them shine at their best topic?
X How much time do you focus on below standard products, or people, and bring them up to an acceptable level? How does this compare to increasing your best people or products?
X How many meetings are about correcting things, as opposed to making something good even better?
X Your performance system in your organisation – is this based on exceeding at strengths, or bringing everyone up to an acceptable level?
X What is your biggest plus point of your company? – how much time do you spend on using this to be even more successful?
In our society, there is a deep seated behavioural trait to correct things, to make weaknesses acceptable, to spot people’s mistakes. It is important not to ignore clearly unacceptable behaviour etc., but my question is how much effort goes into this, in comparison to improving what is already a winning strength?
Indulge yourself for a moment and think about something that you are really good at and enjoy doing. It maybe anything from playing golf, to speaking to the team, to cooking or driving – whatever. Imagine that you are doing it right now…. How does it feel? Are you smiling, are the hairs on the back of your neck standing up, are your shoulders relaxed? – does it feel good? People are at the best when they like to do something, when they know they are doing it well, when they use their strengths to achieve greater things. So can you use this knowledge and maximise people’s opportunity to feel like this? – the results will follow!
So – some questions for you to consider and act upon;
X What are the business’s top three strengths?
X What can I do differently that will use the strengths of our company to win more business?
X What are my top strengths – how can I use these actively on a daily basis?
X In developing our people, what is the balance between encouragement of strengths, and correcting weaknesses?
Try this too: As you walk into to your office, or a café, restaurant or home, focus on just the strengths of that environment and not the irritations – what do you notice that perhaps you have not allowed yourself to do in the past? How can these be adapted for use elsewhere?
In people, what are the best things about the people around you, at home and at work? Do you make the most of these?
If you look at elite and successful people, from Lance Armstrong, to Mozart, to Richard Branson, their success has been on identifying a unique strength on honing it to an excellent level. That is not to say that they don’t focus on correcting some inefficiencies or bad habits – but their emphasis will have been on the positive – to become even greater. It takes courage.
So – be courageous and start with yourself. What is your greatest strength and how are you going to maximise its use today?
Until next week,
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at Xfusion; www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
‘Patience - is it a virtue?!’
As a successful Leader and Entrepreneur, there is a vast amount of written material about your quickness to spot opportunities, your ability to make snap decisions, and your response to acting upon ‘gut feelings’ (as we have discussed previously). All of these are a critical part of your strengths in leading a corporation, a team and an idea.
Within your toolbox of skills and attributes there is also an extremely valuable tool called ‘patience’ which may not always be brought out to maximise its value. This is the balance to your quickness, and plays an equally important part of your success. Let’s focus on the importance of patience in your role as a Leader, particularly in relation to people.
Some quick questions to ascertain your patience in a normal environment
X How often do you give your undivided attention to someone?
X How understanding are you if someone does not ‘get the point’?
X If someone is not doing what you had intended, what is your normal course of action?
X How long will you wait for the right customer?
X How often do you change your goals?
Based on the answers, you can probably feel whether your approach life and work as a tortoise or hare! However, if you are more ‘hare’ like, have a think about why you are impatient with some people, (and/or yourself).
How much of it is about confidence? Are you confident in the person, are you confident in the right answer, and are you confident in your own ability? Or are you being impatient because you are not quite sure that it is the right person, goal or direction? We often choose a quick course of action to hide a real issue or decision, which may fix it once, but does not solve the real issue.
It is fascinating to note the link between confidence and patience. Being patient requires greater confidence in knowing what you want, in knowing your goals and ideas are right. If you know deep down that they are right, you know that you can wait until the time is right to implement them.
Having recently worked with a very successful Elite Tennis Coach, he was very clear about the critical importance of patience. He consistently works with his clients to develop a strategy that was process-focused rather than results-focused. He said that if they worked patiently on the process, the results always followed. Conversely, if they focused just on results, they would try to find a quick way to get to the result, and never have a good foundation of style, method or tactics to enable them to be sustainable champions. He stated that you win games by the opponent’s mistakes. A champion will be patient in their approach and being confident and consistent in their method. Just watch Roger Federer to see an excellent example of this approach!
This view of patience and confidence can be successfully adopted in business too. Stop for a moment and think about your potential clients you are hoping to win in the coming months.
X How confident are you in that they are the right match for your service/product?
X What makes you sure?
X What methods are you using to win them as clients?
X Are these results-focused or process-focused methods?
X How confident are you that these will build a forging relationship?
X How much of your approach is a quick fix to your competition?
X How long will you wait for the right clients?
By considering the answers to these questions will make you more aware about your confidence to deliver. If you are completely confident in winning them, then you know that you can afford to be patient. If you are finding that you are impatient to win them over, are you cutting corners, or covering up cracks, that may damage your relationship longer term.
So, when you are out there today, try to spot when you are being impatient. At that time, ask yourself ‘what is causing the impatience?’ – you may find that the metaphorical tortoise may be a wiser choice!
Until next week,
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at X fusion.
www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Within your toolbox of skills and attributes there is also an extremely valuable tool called ‘patience’ which may not always be brought out to maximise its value. This is the balance to your quickness, and plays an equally important part of your success. Let’s focus on the importance of patience in your role as a Leader, particularly in relation to people.
Some quick questions to ascertain your patience in a normal environment
X How often do you give your undivided attention to someone?
X How understanding are you if someone does not ‘get the point’?
X If someone is not doing what you had intended, what is your normal course of action?
X How long will you wait for the right customer?
X How often do you change your goals?
Based on the answers, you can probably feel whether your approach life and work as a tortoise or hare! However, if you are more ‘hare’ like, have a think about why you are impatient with some people, (and/or yourself).
How much of it is about confidence? Are you confident in the person, are you confident in the right answer, and are you confident in your own ability? Or are you being impatient because you are not quite sure that it is the right person, goal or direction? We often choose a quick course of action to hide a real issue or decision, which may fix it once, but does not solve the real issue.
It is fascinating to note the link between confidence and patience. Being patient requires greater confidence in knowing what you want, in knowing your goals and ideas are right. If you know deep down that they are right, you know that you can wait until the time is right to implement them.
Having recently worked with a very successful Elite Tennis Coach, he was very clear about the critical importance of patience. He consistently works with his clients to develop a strategy that was process-focused rather than results-focused. He said that if they worked patiently on the process, the results always followed. Conversely, if they focused just on results, they would try to find a quick way to get to the result, and never have a good foundation of style, method or tactics to enable them to be sustainable champions. He stated that you win games by the opponent’s mistakes. A champion will be patient in their approach and being confident and consistent in their method. Just watch Roger Federer to see an excellent example of this approach!
This view of patience and confidence can be successfully adopted in business too. Stop for a moment and think about your potential clients you are hoping to win in the coming months.
X How confident are you in that they are the right match for your service/product?
X What makes you sure?
X What methods are you using to win them as clients?
X Are these results-focused or process-focused methods?
X How confident are you that these will build a forging relationship?
X How much of your approach is a quick fix to your competition?
X How long will you wait for the right clients?
By considering the answers to these questions will make you more aware about your confidence to deliver. If you are completely confident in winning them, then you know that you can afford to be patient. If you are finding that you are impatient to win them over, are you cutting corners, or covering up cracks, that may damage your relationship longer term.
So, when you are out there today, try to spot when you are being impatient. At that time, ask yourself ‘what is causing the impatience?’ – you may find that the metaphorical tortoise may be a wiser choice!
Until next week,
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at X fusion.
www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
There is always the need for creative thinking..
As a CEO it is essential that the innovative ideas and creative ability of the talent within your business is harnessed. Much like the disappointment when one goes to a favourite café or restaurant and the coffee, the service, whatever you like the place for, is no longer as it was. Or is it? Is it perhaps just that you’ve been to the same place for so long, doing the same things and it’s time for a change. To move on.
Of ten I think the same can be said for meetings, essential to business, essential to the forward propulsion of a company, and essential for new ideas. Meetings are wonderful tools for generating ideas, expanding on thoughts and managing group activity. But this face-to-face contact with team members and colleagues can easily fail without adequate preparation and leadership.
Business challenges require lateral and creative thought to make sense of, or impact on a situation and therefore really facilitate a change. Sadly, many meetings all to often are ‘flat’ and a bit ‘same old, same old’? Or worse, there is a danger that there are so many meetings and therefore no time for actions.
So, to ensure that you get the most out your meetings;
Do you regularly ask the following questions;
X Is the agenda always formatted in the same way?
X Do people invariably take the same seat?
X Who chairs the meeting?
X Is it relevant ? Is it currently relevant?
X Are the right people attending? Stop for a minute to consider the hourly cost to your company of the people attending your meeting. You'll realise that calling a meeting is expensive, so it's important to ensure that every person attending and every minute of your meeting adds value.
X Are you inviting people who won't participate but will simply report back to you or their team (sending a copy of the minutes will be a more effective way of achieving this).
X Are you using meetings to tell people things that could be communicated just as effectively by email or memo.
X Is anything different going to happen? i.e. 10 minutes for ideas, start by asking a question?
X Are there one or two people there with different responsibilities that will challenge and ask questions?
X Finally, embracing creative thinking, allowing ourselves to think of many, many different possible solutions to a situation and therefore not
impoverish our ability to find a solution or idea is the way forward.
And remember;
X Challenge is never a criticism……..
X Set out to be provocative to encourage creative thought……….
X Treat all possibilities seriously ……..
Companies such as Gore, Apple and Saatchi are well-known for embracing creative thinking and it is in these companies where brilliance and success happens……….often.
As the great creative thinker himself said;
‘There is always the need for creative thinking – it is essential and not a luxury’ ,
Edward de Bono
Until next week..
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at X fusion; www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Of ten I think the same can be said for meetings, essential to business, essential to the forward propulsion of a company, and essential for new ideas. Meetings are wonderful tools for generating ideas, expanding on thoughts and managing group activity. But this face-to-face contact with team members and colleagues can easily fail without adequate preparation and leadership.
Business challenges require lateral and creative thought to make sense of, or impact on a situation and therefore really facilitate a change. Sadly, many meetings all to often are ‘flat’ and a bit ‘same old, same old’? Or worse, there is a danger that there are so many meetings and therefore no time for actions.
So, to ensure that you get the most out your meetings;
Do you regularly ask the following questions;
X Is the agenda always formatted in the same way?
X Do people invariably take the same seat?
X Who chairs the meeting?
X Is it relevant ? Is it currently relevant?
X Are the right people attending? Stop for a minute to consider the hourly cost to your company of the people attending your meeting. You'll realise that calling a meeting is expensive, so it's important to ensure that every person attending and every minute of your meeting adds value.
X Are you inviting people who won't participate but will simply report back to you or their team (sending a copy of the minutes will be a more effective way of achieving this).
X Are you using meetings to tell people things that could be communicated just as effectively by email or memo.
X Is anything different going to happen? i.e. 10 minutes for ideas, start by asking a question?
X Are there one or two people there with different responsibilities that will challenge and ask questions?
X Finally, embracing creative thinking, allowing ourselves to think of many, many different possible solutions to a situation and therefore not
impoverish our ability to find a solution or idea is the way forward.
And remember;
X Challenge is never a criticism……..
X Set out to be provocative to encourage creative thought……….
X Treat all possibilities seriously ……..
Companies such as Gore, Apple and Saatchi are well-known for embracing creative thinking and it is in these companies where brilliance and success happens……….often.
As the great creative thinker himself said;
‘There is always the need for creative thinking – it is essential and not a luxury’ ,
Edward de Bono
Until next week..
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at X fusion; www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Procrastination in the thief of time.
Have a quick look in your diary or your PDA, and see what tasks you have set yourself this week. Now – being completely honest, is there a task in there that you just keep putting off, or dreading? Will you find every excuse not to do it? (E.g – it is not THAT important, he will be difficult, it may take me too long, I am not sure how to do it etc.) You are also aware that leaving it later and later will make it more difficult and/or traumatic in achieving. Or are you hoping that by ignoring it, it will simply go away?! Ask yourself if using your energy in worrying and procrastinating over this task is better than spending that energy elsewhere! As a leader, you will, quite likely, be pushed to the limits in terms of time, and should ensure your energy is effective and efficiently spent – lingering issues are not helpful!
So – take 5 minutes and sit quietly, with a cuppa or a coffee and ask yourselves these questions, to try to get to the bottom of your procrastination:
• What is stopping you?
• Who or what would it impact if I did not do this?
• What is my biggest fear in relation to the task?
• What is the worst thing that could happen if I did this task?
Write the answers down and look at them. Is there a pattern emerging?
Firstly, it may be the Fear Factor. It has been proven that over 80% of the worries people have, never actually happen. How much of the above is exactly that? If it is, ask yourself
• if you knew that you could not fail, what would you do now?
• How will I feel when I have achieved it?
Clearly we are not encouraging you to take inconsiderate risks, but often is just getting started that makes the worries disappear (or get easier to deal with!).
The thought of failure may also encourage you to look for things that always go wrong. Let’s turn that on its head. Consider a task that you can do that is always successful. How do you achieve that task? What pattern of behaviour or action that you do makes it successful? Could this pattern of success be used to help you achieve other tasks? Right now, I would like to you consider a specific task that you do well everyday. It could be getting to the bottom of issues, inspiring people at work, or even getting up in the morning! Think carefully of what you do, say and think to achieve this. It is important to consider your thinking patterns as you do it, and not just the output. Can you map any part of this thinking onto the task that you are struggling with? These thoughts, sayings or actions are the very patterns that have made you successful so far, so be very aware of them and use them in every opportunity.
Learning from others is also a useful strategy. Consider someone else tackling your task who you think would be good at it. How would they do it? What is different about their pattern? What could you learn from them? Try and see the task through their eyes and have a go.
Lastly, is it your mind-set? You may have already put in your mind that this is going to be difficult, boring, long, expensive, or unpopular. Do you really know that? You can change how you feel about that picture right now, as it is in your head at this stage and not yet reality. So - practise thinking the opposite to that negativity. For example, it is going to be interesting, challenging, or a good experience to learn. You can practise this ‘change of mind-set’ on more simple things. For example, if you are really tired in the morning, try thinking ‘WOW – another day already!’ rather than ‘I am really tired’ – You will be amazed at how your day is that much more agreeable, as well as helping you to practise mind-set changes.
In summary, these questions and exercises above are all designed to help you increase the options that you have to help tackle procrastination and to save your energy for positive and valuable tasks.
Go and make yourself have a great day!
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk.
So – take 5 minutes and sit quietly, with a cuppa or a coffee and ask yourselves these questions, to try to get to the bottom of your procrastination:
• What is stopping you?
• Who or what would it impact if I did not do this?
• What is my biggest fear in relation to the task?
• What is the worst thing that could happen if I did this task?
Write the answers down and look at them. Is there a pattern emerging?
Firstly, it may be the Fear Factor. It has been proven that over 80% of the worries people have, never actually happen. How much of the above is exactly that? If it is, ask yourself
• if you knew that you could not fail, what would you do now?
• How will I feel when I have achieved it?
Clearly we are not encouraging you to take inconsiderate risks, but often is just getting started that makes the worries disappear (or get easier to deal with!).
The thought of failure may also encourage you to look for things that always go wrong. Let’s turn that on its head. Consider a task that you can do that is always successful. How do you achieve that task? What pattern of behaviour or action that you do makes it successful? Could this pattern of success be used to help you achieve other tasks? Right now, I would like to you consider a specific task that you do well everyday. It could be getting to the bottom of issues, inspiring people at work, or even getting up in the morning! Think carefully of what you do, say and think to achieve this. It is important to consider your thinking patterns as you do it, and not just the output. Can you map any part of this thinking onto the task that you are struggling with? These thoughts, sayings or actions are the very patterns that have made you successful so far, so be very aware of them and use them in every opportunity.
Learning from others is also a useful strategy. Consider someone else tackling your task who you think would be good at it. How would they do it? What is different about their pattern? What could you learn from them? Try and see the task through their eyes and have a go.
Lastly, is it your mind-set? You may have already put in your mind that this is going to be difficult, boring, long, expensive, or unpopular. Do you really know that? You can change how you feel about that picture right now, as it is in your head at this stage and not yet reality. So - practise thinking the opposite to that negativity. For example, it is going to be interesting, challenging, or a good experience to learn. You can practise this ‘change of mind-set’ on more simple things. For example, if you are really tired in the morning, try thinking ‘WOW – another day already!’ rather than ‘I am really tired’ – You will be amazed at how your day is that much more agreeable, as well as helping you to practise mind-set changes.
In summary, these questions and exercises above are all designed to help you increase the options that you have to help tackle procrastination and to save your energy for positive and valuable tasks.
Go and make yourself have a great day!
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk.
The Focus Phenomenon
So – it is that time when you decide you need to replace the car. You look at various brochures, adverts on TV and in magazines, and probably cut the list down to two or three. Then, amazingly enough, as you drive around to and from work, the gym, picking children up – you start to notice a huge amount of THAT type of car. It suddenly seems that everyone has the same taste as yourself – even the colour. Don’t worry, you are saved from becoming ‘just like everyone else’ – it is in fact the Focus Phenomenon. Our brains have to take in millions of bits of information continuously, and simply can not process all of it; it has to find a way to filter some information out and focus on the key things. Our subconscious mind is brilliant at alerting it to the things that it believes you need to focus on – without us consciously knowing, in many instances. The Focus Phenomenon is not only brilliant, but can be utilised to make you even more successful at being a leader. However, it can also limit your thinking if not kept in check – so let’s focus on making it useful.
Our subconscious mind acts as an excellent filter so that you can sift through huge amounts of data to focus on the key information, which is something that you will do, as a Leader everyday. Even if you have not physically said ‘OK subconscious mind – let’s focus on overheads, or the HR department, or this marketing programme’ the subconscious mind will assume to focus on things that have been processing in your brain recently, and your assumptions or learnt behaviours. Think back to the last time you poured over data. How quickly could you pick out what you needed? What had you told your brain to focus on, and was this consciously or subconsciously? Therefore what we THINK or ASSUME becomes the trigger for filtering, and you can train your brain easily and effortlessly. Make conscious your thoughts or questions – and really experience them so that the brain knows what they feel like. You may even want to write them down to cement them clearly in your brain. Then leave the rest to the Focus Phenomenon. Try it with your next challenge.
Before you think that this is too easy, you also need to consider what do you MISS as a consequence of that filtering process?
Think about the next team meeting coming up, or one-to-one with one of your colleagues. What assumptions have you made about that person, or the content of the meeting? What are you looking for? The answers to these will probably help you get to the information that you are looking for quickly. However, you are also in danger of missing much more, by the assumptions that you make.
A client of mine recently was ‘exasperated’ with one of their team members, as they would always take forever to come to the point. When he would start to talk in the meeting, you could almost feel the sighs from around the table. His subconscious mind immediately said that this is going to take forever so do something else, rather than listen. As a result, the whole team missed some great points, by making a huge assumption about the quality of this person’s contribution. How often do you do that? Make an assumption about someone, before they have had a chance? And of course, the subconscious mind looks for CONFIRMATION of your assumptions and focuses on those – ‘I told you so’ – so they never have a chance unless, of course, you choose to change your thought process.
In a meeting coming up, see if you can instruct your mind to make no assumptions, and try to really listen to this person as if you did not know them – and find out something that you may well have missed by your Focus Phenomenon.
If you stepped into the next meeting with colleagues, and said ‘please don’t go to sleep in the next hour’ – just wait to see how many of them will yawn through that meeting! Unfortunately, the brain does not detect negatives, so will focus on SLEEP, rather than ‘don’t’. This is the same reason that you miss that goal in football, if the coach has been yelling ‘Don’t miss the goal posts’! How many of your ‘Focus Phenomena’ thoughts are negative? – ‘I must not miss this deadline’, ‘I will not eat that extra bag of crisps’,’ I am really tired today’. Your brain will do an excellent job of reminding you continually of all these negative things. Go out there today and be positive in your thinking – it will soon happen without you thinking!
Use your Focus Phenomenon to your advantage – train your brain to focus on the important things, the positive things and surprise yourself by changing the focus on occasions – you may suddenly see something that has been staring you in the face!
Until next week
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at Xfusion, www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Our subconscious mind acts as an excellent filter so that you can sift through huge amounts of data to focus on the key information, which is something that you will do, as a Leader everyday. Even if you have not physically said ‘OK subconscious mind – let’s focus on overheads, or the HR department, or this marketing programme’ the subconscious mind will assume to focus on things that have been processing in your brain recently, and your assumptions or learnt behaviours. Think back to the last time you poured over data. How quickly could you pick out what you needed? What had you told your brain to focus on, and was this consciously or subconsciously? Therefore what we THINK or ASSUME becomes the trigger for filtering, and you can train your brain easily and effortlessly. Make conscious your thoughts or questions – and really experience them so that the brain knows what they feel like. You may even want to write them down to cement them clearly in your brain. Then leave the rest to the Focus Phenomenon. Try it with your next challenge.
Before you think that this is too easy, you also need to consider what do you MISS as a consequence of that filtering process?
Think about the next team meeting coming up, or one-to-one with one of your colleagues. What assumptions have you made about that person, or the content of the meeting? What are you looking for? The answers to these will probably help you get to the information that you are looking for quickly. However, you are also in danger of missing much more, by the assumptions that you make.
A client of mine recently was ‘exasperated’ with one of their team members, as they would always take forever to come to the point. When he would start to talk in the meeting, you could almost feel the sighs from around the table. His subconscious mind immediately said that this is going to take forever so do something else, rather than listen. As a result, the whole team missed some great points, by making a huge assumption about the quality of this person’s contribution. How often do you do that? Make an assumption about someone, before they have had a chance? And of course, the subconscious mind looks for CONFIRMATION of your assumptions and focuses on those – ‘I told you so’ – so they never have a chance unless, of course, you choose to change your thought process.
In a meeting coming up, see if you can instruct your mind to make no assumptions, and try to really listen to this person as if you did not know them – and find out something that you may well have missed by your Focus Phenomenon.
If you stepped into the next meeting with colleagues, and said ‘please don’t go to sleep in the next hour’ – just wait to see how many of them will yawn through that meeting! Unfortunately, the brain does not detect negatives, so will focus on SLEEP, rather than ‘don’t’. This is the same reason that you miss that goal in football, if the coach has been yelling ‘Don’t miss the goal posts’! How many of your ‘Focus Phenomena’ thoughts are negative? – ‘I must not miss this deadline’, ‘I will not eat that extra bag of crisps’,’ I am really tired today’. Your brain will do an excellent job of reminding you continually of all these negative things. Go out there today and be positive in your thinking – it will soon happen without you thinking!
Use your Focus Phenomenon to your advantage – train your brain to focus on the important things, the positive things and surprise yourself by changing the focus on occasions – you may suddenly see something that has been staring you in the face!
Until next week
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at Xfusion, www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
Communication to succeed
As discussed last week, it is impossible not to communicate – if that is the case, do we treat it with the respect and trepidation that it deserves?! As a CEO, effective communication is one of your finest tools in your armoury – so how can you use it to your very best advantage?
When was the last time that you looked/read your own communications or announcements, as if you were the recipient?
Have a quick look at a sample of your last week’s output , and what does it ‘say ‘ to you – does the style reflect your personality, what did it say about your mood that day, what assumptions had you made when writing it? Do there seem to be any hidden agendas in there? What message are you conveying? Is it written by you, or your PA?
Writing is such a powerful medium, it is invaluable to not only think about the content, but the style, format, length, and choice of media that is appropriate for the communication. When people receive your communication, their brain will be full of literally millions of transactions. Give them the best chance to get the message as you want. Firstly, give them the simple facts to be able to understand the message clearly. Make sure that your assumptions about their knowledge on the topics is correct.- spell it out if you are not sure. If you want their attention, appeal to their senses (remember last week?). Use appropriate language and style in order to demonstrate your passion or feelings around the message. If it is a message from you, use words, and phrases that are clearly yours.
How often do you send an email or text, rather than picking up the phone, or actually visiting someone?
CEO’s always have the need for 26 or more hours a day, so emailing is often a very efficient means of working. However, do you ask yourself if this is the right medium for that communication? How would it come across if you used voice, or eye to eye contact to enhance your communication? In the long run, we can often save hours of debate and nip issues in the bud, by simply meeting with someone, eye to eye, or picking up the phone.
Additionally, be honest, how much of your choice of medium is due to wanting to convey a message and not listen to a response? Be careful that you are not hiding an issue that will just get bigger in time.
What are they telling you – without telling you?!
Humans are amazing creatures in that we communicate with many parts of our body other than our voice. Eye movement, eye contact, body posture, gestures, body movement – all of these are ways to communicate without even opening your mouth. Just sitting in a pub, watching other people, you can quickly see whom is interested in whom, without overhearing the conversation – all through body language. In meetings, how often have your heard ‘Yes’ but you know that means ‘Maybe’ or ‘No’? Our subconscious mind will pick up those unheard communications – and it is up to you to do something with that information. Act on that knowledge, your intuition; it can be invaluable in telling you something that has not been ‘said’.
Communication is two-way
Being the CEO means that you are a Leader. However, that does not mean that you have to come up with all the answers. Listening to those around you; Clients, Suppliers, Colleagues, and Competitors provides you with a wealth of useful information. Why not give yourself permission to sit and listen at various times of the day, rather than doing the talking,– and you will be rewarded by a mass of hidden communication and information.
‘When to start and when…’
Mozart communicated his passion of life through music, but was clearly aware of the importance of all forms of communications. A quote from the master himself ‘To talk well and eloquently is a very great art, but an equally great one is to know the right moment to stop.’,
Until next week.
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
When was the last time that you looked/read your own communications or announcements, as if you were the recipient?
Have a quick look at a sample of your last week’s output , and what does it ‘say ‘ to you – does the style reflect your personality, what did it say about your mood that day, what assumptions had you made when writing it? Do there seem to be any hidden agendas in there? What message are you conveying? Is it written by you, or your PA?
Writing is such a powerful medium, it is invaluable to not only think about the content, but the style, format, length, and choice of media that is appropriate for the communication. When people receive your communication, their brain will be full of literally millions of transactions. Give them the best chance to get the message as you want. Firstly, give them the simple facts to be able to understand the message clearly. Make sure that your assumptions about their knowledge on the topics is correct.- spell it out if you are not sure. If you want their attention, appeal to their senses (remember last week?). Use appropriate language and style in order to demonstrate your passion or feelings around the message. If it is a message from you, use words, and phrases that are clearly yours.
How often do you send an email or text, rather than picking up the phone, or actually visiting someone?
CEO’s always have the need for 26 or more hours a day, so emailing is often a very efficient means of working. However, do you ask yourself if this is the right medium for that communication? How would it come across if you used voice, or eye to eye contact to enhance your communication? In the long run, we can often save hours of debate and nip issues in the bud, by simply meeting with someone, eye to eye, or picking up the phone.
Additionally, be honest, how much of your choice of medium is due to wanting to convey a message and not listen to a response? Be careful that you are not hiding an issue that will just get bigger in time.
What are they telling you – without telling you?!
Humans are amazing creatures in that we communicate with many parts of our body other than our voice. Eye movement, eye contact, body posture, gestures, body movement – all of these are ways to communicate without even opening your mouth. Just sitting in a pub, watching other people, you can quickly see whom is interested in whom, without overhearing the conversation – all through body language. In meetings, how often have your heard ‘Yes’ but you know that means ‘Maybe’ or ‘No’? Our subconscious mind will pick up those unheard communications – and it is up to you to do something with that information. Act on that knowledge, your intuition; it can be invaluable in telling you something that has not been ‘said’.
Communication is two-way
Being the CEO means that you are a Leader. However, that does not mean that you have to come up with all the answers. Listening to those around you; Clients, Suppliers, Colleagues, and Competitors provides you with a wealth of useful information. Why not give yourself permission to sit and listen at various times of the day, rather than doing the talking,– and you will be rewarded by a mass of hidden communication and information.
‘When to start and when…’
Mozart communicated his passion of life through music, but was clearly aware of the importance of all forms of communications. A quote from the master himself ‘To talk well and eloquently is a very great art, but an equally great one is to know the right moment to stop.’,
Until next week.
Kate Tojeiro is an Executive Performance Coach at www.the-x-fusion.co.uk
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