Making the right choices;
A few little words stood out last week, ‘being constantly concerned about other people’s perception of you will never make you happy’! That was the sentiment anyway - I was reading Russell Brand’s autobiography, half-way up a hill in Tuscany – so that may not be word-perfect!
At this time of year, a time for reflection, review and looking to and planning for the year ahead - as individuals, managers, chief executives - it is sometimes easy to be swayed by others views and doing the same thing. Not rocking the proverbial boat! I work with many clients to make choices that are for them, truly for them and not what they believe others desire from them. How they should behave, what they should drive, how they should live etc……. be true to you and the rest will follow.
I was party to a conversation just before Christmas about ‘choices’. One individual in the debate was of the belief that some things we just ‘have’ to do, and he believed that there was no choice in certain situations; his example was the following; a friend supporting a large family and large house with correspondingly large mortgage, and commuting to London from the home counties, and working for a boss that he dislikes….. One of my colleagues rather artfully assisted him in changing his thinking… having a large family – a choice, a large house with a large mortgage – a choice, commuting to London - a choice, working for a boss you dislike – a choice……all of the above can be changed if you truly want to.
Of course these are all choices, each and every one and whatever it is that we are doing in life, there is always a choice…
A few little words stood out last week, ‘being constantly concerned about other people’s perception of you will never make you happy’! That was the sentiment anyway - I was reading Russell Brand’s autobiography, half-way up a hill in Tuscany – so that may not be word-perfect!
At this time of year, a time for reflection, review and looking to and planning for the year ahead - as individuals, managers, chief executives - it is sometimes easy to be swayed by others views and doing the same thing. Not rocking the proverbial boat! I work with many clients to make choices that are for them, truly for them and not what they believe others desire from them. How they should behave, what they should drive, how they should live etc……. be true to you and the rest will follow.
I was party to a conversation just before Christmas about ‘choices’. One individual in the debate was of the belief that some things we just ‘have’ to do, and he believed that there was no choice in certain situations; his example was the following; a friend supporting a large family and large house with correspondingly large mortgage, and commuting to London from the home counties, and working for a boss that he dislikes….. One of my colleagues rather artfully assisted him in changing his thinking… having a large family – a choice, a large house with a large mortgage – a choice, commuting to London - a choice, working for a boss you dislike – a choice……all of the above can be changed if you truly want to.
Of course these are all choices, each and every one and whatever it is that we are doing in life, there is always a choice…
- People will always give you differing opinions on which choice you should make.
- You will never know if you made the right choice.
- Someone will always feel you made the wrong choice.
- Not all choices have a “right” or “wrong” answer.
- Any choice can be “right” or “wrong” depending how you treat them.
- What you choose is not as important as how you choose and what you do with your choice.
- You can live with any choice you make.
- You can take responsibility for any choice you make.
- Only you can make your choices.
- Making a choice is an act of will that shapes your life to your dimensions.
- Everyone inevitably makes “wrong” choices sometimes but that’s okay.
- You are the choices you make in life and your future will be determined by them.
So, because you know what happens if you put off thinking about the important stuff i.e. you then put off making things happen.
A few thoughts to help you on your way;
How do you decide what you really want? Try considering your options at each of the five stages that go into every decision.
Usually, we choose so fast that we don't realize just how detailed the process is. But when you think about it, there really are five parts to every decision:
- Identify the issue
- Think through possible solutions or alternatives
- Evaluate the ideas
- Take Action act out the plan
- Learn for the future
For example, during a rather smart meal at Christmas I was confronted with some oysters – which I really don’t like.
Identify the issue (how to not eat the oysters and not offend the host), Think through (feed to the dog, slip into handbag, give to some-one else, be honest), Evaluate the ideas (dogs outside! don’t want oysters in new handbag, paper napkin!), Take Action (honesty won - apologized elegantly – then gave to nephew!), Learn (find out before hand what’s for dinner to take pre-emptive action or carefully position dogs).
So, have a wonderful New Year – filled with all the success, prosperity and excitement that you deserve. For an executive coach to assist you along the path and avoid whatever your own ‘oysters’ maybe, call or email me and I’d be delighted to speak with you. http://www.the-x-fusion.co.uk/, or 01763 853 924.
